January 11, 2011

• (Soda) Pop Culture

  I posted a fun little post today and when I was answering questions it made me remember some of the pop I drank in my youth.  I got to thinking about different pop or for those of you who no habla Wisconics--soda.  There were so many kinds I used to drink.  I lived for pop long before I was able to gorge myself on beer.  Many of my favorite pops as a kid have since gone the way of the Dodo; disappearing into oblivion. Sometimes a few make it back for a second chance at being consumed, but many have faded away only to survive on Ebay and tribute websites. Enjoy them here, while they last.

  13.  Jones Soda Holiday Drinks (Broccoli Casserole, Brussels Sprouts, Corn on the Cob, Pea, Turkey and Gravy, Christmas Ham, and Pecan Pie)

  
  

  I know a lot of people are fans of Jones Soda but I can't seem to find it around here so I don't know if they still make these drinks.  I also remember they had a special gift pack, which is where most of these could be found, that was sold as a Christmas gift set.  I always wanted to give a pack of these to my old man but I know he would have bitched because they weren't diet and then, "Why they hell would I want to drink corn?"  When I was living in Minnesota I could only find this mess at Target.  It was probably because Target was this hip and upstart franchise and Jones Soda was that hip and cool soda that hipsters consumed ironically and then ironically laughed at the ironic sayings under the cap.  One of my exgirlfriends had a Jones when she was looking at schools on the west coast and she gave me the cap.  Is it weird that I still have that cap?  It says, "You and your partner will have a happy life together."  Ironic.

  12.  Mountain Dew Pitch Black
  
  I was student teaching in a town that had a Pepsi bottling company and they had experimental pops.  I can't remember what they called this before it was released as Pitch Black but I wish they brought this one back.  It tasted like a sour grape and lemon mixture.  I know some people are probably cringing at that flavor combination but it was pulled off by this drink.  Isn't it odd that for years and years there was only one Mountain Dew and right now it's probably the most bastardized of Pepsi's products?

  11.  Mountain Dew Distortion
  
  This past summer Pepsi allowed consumers to vote for a new flavor of Mountain Dew.  Distortion was my favorite but it didn't win the popular vote like my candidate in the 2000 election.  The greatest day of my life was when the local grocery had an excess amount because no one bought it so they knocked it down to $2 a case.  Needless to say I still am drinking Distortion.  I won't be buying any of that Mountain Dew that won the vote because it has a strange appearance.
  10. Coke II

  
  In the 80s, Coca-Cola was suffering from declining sales and Pepsi was the big pop so Coca-Cola thought it would be best if they redid their recipe and get rid of the old taste that made them famous.  The concoction wasn't that bad but it wasn't good old-fashioned Coke.   I remember missing the original Coke but if it wasn't for Coke II we would probably never had known the joys of drinking 2 liters of pop because Coke II was the first to come in 2 liter plastic bottles. Coke II will always be known as one of the biggest failures of the 80s.  I think it had more sugar as well. I really do miss this stuff, but sadly, Coke went back to its ‘Classic’ formula permanently, thus making Coke II disappear into antiquity.

  9. Hubba Bubba
  
  The strongest memory I have of Hubba Bubba Soda is from grade school. We, in the ass-backward hole that is rural Wisconsin seemed to drink this stuff by the gallon and as children had our own drinking games involving this gum pop. I can't remember the name of the game but we would stand around drinking it as fast as we could while our mouths were filled with the gum and then we would try to blow bubbles.  Loads of fun. I was never a big fan of this gum-flavored pop because whenever I seemed to drink it I always got a migraine, but it does hold certain high esteem in my clogged memory bank.

  8. Pepsi’s Wild Bunch
  
  I love how Raspberry is cleverly misspelled into ‘cool’ territory with the two ‘Z’s. Very nice. Anyway, the deepest remembrances I have of this particular trio was the chilling innards of my grandparent’s ancient refrigerator on their back porch. It was one of those ‘chill chest’ types with this huge handle that took all over your strength to open and it had enough wattage to cause neighborhood brown outs. And grandma always kept it filled with every type of drink you could imagine.  She always got the pops that were being advertised on TV or knew that we would enjoy.  Dead and gone now. yes, my grandparents, this pop, and my childhood but I still have the refrigerator which will never die.  I can't remember exactly now but this picture has them in a special carrying case.  I can't remember if that was just for display or if you could actually buy a six pack like that.

  7. Surge
  
  Though not out of circulation as long as some of these, Surge has still become a classic to many a pining American. Coca Cola distributed this green soda for quite some time. I can remember it coming in to its own right around 1995 or so, and really building up steam for a few years before succumbing to the popularity of other, weaker, beverages. It had a citrus-like flavor to it but there was something almost lime-Jell-O-ish in the back ground that would always leave a little tang phlegm at the back of my throat. But it was pretty tasty and I could knock back a 2 liter in a sitting no problem. It tasted almost, but not quite, like melted candy.  It was banned in certain counties near my high school because of the high sugar content.  It was astonishing seeing people rush the grocery stores with carts filled with Surge.  I simply think this stuff liquid crack.

  6. Canfield's Chocolate Fudge
  
  I couldn't find an image for this particular drink but I hold it in high regard.  My babysitter used to have a refrigerator filled with Canfield's Chocolate Fudge.  Imagine taking a piece of chocolate cake and blending it with seltzer water until it was pure liquid.  This drink too gave me migraines but that was the price I had to pay to have this delicious concoction enter my system.  When the Diet Chocolate Fudge came out it was disaster.  It was horrible and then they changed the artwork on the can and it was supposed to be a chocolate bar but it looked more like a giant turd, and with that I stopped drinking chocolate soda.

  5. Josta
  
  This was a pretty recent disappearance. I think I had one of these back when Guarana was a new craze in drinks and Pepsi was trying to market it as a source of energy. Josta was so chock-full of the stuff you could, in fact, taste it. It was a tad medicine-y, but that flavor was nicely buried beneath the strong fruit and spice flavors that assaulted your taste buds moments before. This pop was far different taste wise than just about anything else out there and is one that I do not miss whatsoever.

  4. Orbitz
  
  Oh yeah, soda with little chewy chunks in it. Outstanding. Somehow, the creators of this beverage managed to thwart the normalcies of science by allowing starch nuggets to suspend themselves ever so beautifully in a super-sweet solution. It was really good, too. I remember Target selling the hell out of this stuff for quite a while. I enjoyed the drinking part, but somehow, coming to the little lumps floating there in was a lot like drinking a glass of gravy… except a lot sweeter.

  3. Kick
  
  Kick was a lot like the bastard step-son of Mountain Dew and Mello Yellow. It tasted really similar to both, but almost leaning a bit toward Mello Yellow with its citrus overtones. I actually preferred it over either and would go through a case of this stuff during my late night Mystery Science Theater 3000 marathons.  To me is was the poor man's Surge.  Sort of like Sam's Club's Dr. Radical or Mountain Mist.  I have heard that Kick is still on the market but alas I can never find it.

  2. Slice
  
  Slice was the precursor to Sierra Mist by the Pepsi corporation and for my buck, it tasted a whole lot better. My grandmother, in her massive fridge, used to keep a constant supply of the Mandarin Orange flavor of this stuff. I hated mandarin oranges in any form at that time, so I stuck to the lemon-lime standard and all was good with the world. There was something less overpowering about Slice as compared to 7-UP; not quite as crisp, not quite as effervescent, but certainly just as tasty.  The absolute best thing in the world was Dr. Slice, the Pepsico attempt at Dr. Pepper.  Too bad it never caught on.  Although I know a few places where I can still buy it.

  1. Crystal Pepsi
  
  I was in grade school in 1993 and this soda was a huge hit in Wisconsin. The selling price was less than any other cola and I remember getting cases of Crystal Pepsi at the local Kickapoo(yes, Kickapoo, we honor our native Americans around here by naming gas stations after them but then they got bought out by Kwik Trip) for at least $1 cheaper than regular Pepsi.   I honestly loved this stuff, I would drink the HELL out of a pack a week. I loved this stuff and another fun fact was that it never exploded if you shook it before you opened a can.  One time, to prove my point, I threw a can on my roof so that it could roll down and then I could open it without an expolosion.  Well the can got caught in one of the eaves.  I didn't get the can out a few months later. No I didn't taste it.  This pop also introduced me to Van Halen.  Yes, the whole marketing campaign revolved around Van Halen's "Right Now".  Anyway, there was just something about the non-caramel colored Pepsi that really appealed to me. I miss this the most of all.

  Honorable mention:
  Pepsi Free (with the pink can and blue balloons)
  Tab (now an energy drink for women)
  
  Coke Blak(coffee flavored coke)
  Bawls(an energy drink with a funny name)
  Donkey Kick (energy drink sold at Super America gas stations, every time I bought a can I laughed because I wanted it to be Donkey Punch but they did have another flavor and that was Rooster Booster, I always had images a liquid Viagra with that one)
  
  Jolt(hard to find in Wisconsin because of sugar and caffeine content, the best is the mountain dew style Jolt)
  Cheerwine(Cherry flavored pop that tasted like sparkling wine)
  Manazita Sol (Pepsi apple pop.  I have only seen it in stores twice since it was released)
  
  Pepsi Fire and Ice (The "fire" was cinnamon Pepsi and the "ice" was a mint Pepsi)
  
  Pepsi Blue(this was another berry/cola infusion that somehow never took off)
  Sprite Tropical Remix (three different styles of infused Sprite, one was berry, one was cherry and one was tropical)
  OK Soda (Hilarious TV ads from Coke.  Tried to appeal to Gen X.  Had unique comic book style cans)
  Citra (Coke's answer to Fresca or Squirt)
  
  Red Fusion by Dr. Pepper(it was their first attempt at a cherry flavored Dr. Pepper but from what people say it tasted like Cherry Nyquil)
  Lifesaver Pop(yes, Lifesavers got into the pop game.  It came in five flavors and basically tasted like unfrozen Flavor Ice)
  7-Up Gold (Actually a form of Dr. Pepper but put under the 7-Up name.  Somewhat comparable to a ginger ale.  Think spicy 7-Up)
  dnL (this was the upside down 7-Up.  It was the opposite of 7-Up: caffeinated, green, and in a clear bottle)
  Tahitian Treat
  Element Rain (Produced by Snapple, originally an agave cactus flavored juice, now an energy drink)
  
  Mountain Dew Ultra Violet
  
  Pepsi Ice Cucumber

  
  Pepsi Kona...Pepsi's coffee infused pop
  
  Diet Coke Raspberry...pretty self-explanatory
  
  Pepsi Holiday Spice...they said it was supposed to be a cinnamon Pepsi but to me it tasted of gingerbread
  
  Pepsi Cino- a Pepsi with an added flavor of cappuccino.
  
  Leninade...by far the best communist themed lemonade on the market.

  If anyone has any other pop to add to my list feel free to drop a line.

  • 12:32 PM
  • 77 Comments