I know I am a day late but last night I indulged in $1.50 Leine pints.  Baraboo is awesome.  Well enough said.  Time for a Celebrity Round-Up.


Oh, Amy, you are my celebrity crush.  Too bad you have been going through some rough times as of late but I guess life is a series of ups and downs.  Her house was raided and I guess they found her stash but it was more or less to bust her husband.  Apparently he is facing life in prison for tampering with a court case.  He was coercing a witness to change testimony.  The British really take their court seriously whereas we in America make court into a tv network and a 3 ring circus.  Anyway, Amy I still am single if you need a shoulder to cry on.  Also I like jazz so I'm just putting it out there.  God she is so gorgeous.

Remember a long time ago when Tara Reid looked good?  It was back during the first American Pie movie.  Then she turned into a complete lush and became nothing more than common gutter trash.  Well it looks like she is starting to turn trashy again either that or she is a few years late for her audition for a role on The Sopranos.  I am going with the latter probably because she had a wicked hangover that has lasted 3 years.  Do you remember the TV series she had where the entire show was her being drunk?  Yeah I vaguely remember it because it didn't last that long.  Anyway she still looks like crap and probably will never be popular again unless she has a sex tape.  Sex tapes seem to make people stars nowadays.  Expect to see mine in stores soon.

Oh Britney!  She is texting while driving.  Pretty safe, huh?  Not to a commissioner in Los Angeles.  She was prohibited from operating a motor vehicle while her children are passengers.  Here's what you may not know: when the commissioner made the ruling her children said their first words, "HELL YES!"  Wow, Britney looks like crap.  Either she has had too much booger sugar, has an new outbreak of herpes, or visited Kanye West's mother's plastic surgeon to get her lips down.  Yes, she did have a botched lip job.  Just another strange incidence in her freaky life. 

Britney and I have something in common.  We're both asthmatics.  The only difference is that she developed hers after abusing her body with smoking whereas I was an infant and was treated to secondhand smoke while I was being bottle fed by my father.  Also Britney finally submitted to a drug test this week and guess what she failed.  It was explained by her lawyers that the failure was due to her use of an inhaler.  I need to use that excuse if I ever get in trouble with the law.  She then took another test and failed again.  This time they blamed it on her ADD medicine.  Once again Britney Spears and I have something in common.  Oh yeah and she is giving my great excuses to use whenever I get caught.  Who would have thought Britney Spears could be a fount of information?

Here is a picture of Fabio's attempt to one up George Clooney: Barely Legal Arm Candy.  Kristen Bell and Hayden Panettiere look like they are either in heaven or trying to be polite to the old man.  Fabio just has this grin on his face that is saying, "Screw you, Clooney!"  God what divas!

Jordan or Katie Price or whatever the hell she goes by these days doing a little pole dancing with her wanker husband.  This is from their reality show.  If you have ever seen their reality show then I apologize.  You have wasted a half hour of your life that you will never get back.  Sucks to be you.  I just know her from...THIS.

Looks like Gay-Rod will be staying in New York for the next ten years and that means ten more years of me making Gay-Rod comments.  Aren't you, my readers, so lucky!


This is Sarah Harding.  You may wonder who is Sarah Harding.  Well she is a member of the pop group Girls Aloud.  She was discovered after performing at Karaoke nights in her favorite pub.  He she is uncovered.  I a, a fan.

For being 45, Demi Moore still knows how to rock a bikini.  I hate to say this but Ashton Kutcher is a lucky guy and I am envious.

Holy crap!  Lindsay Lohan actually learned something in rehab.  She learned how to wear panties.  NICE!  Not that I hate nudity but crack whores just don't have appealing parts.  Anyway she as recently quoted as saying, "Rehab was a sobering experience."  I'll let you make your own joke there.

Well I see the new look for men this year is faux-drunk.  I think I can pull that look off.

This week Phil Jackson, head coach of the Los Angeles Lakers, landed in some hot water when he described a recent loss by his teams as their "Brokeback Mountain" game because of all the penetration and kick-outs.  So I guess "Brokeback Mountain" jokes are back in style.  Here are two.

Even though this is Peyton Manning and his coach Tony Dungy, there are a lot of rumors flying around of Peyton dating country music star Kenny Chesney.  Either way, Brokeback Mountain is funny again.

With that have an excellent rest of your weekend and be thankful if where you are it isn't snowing.