Awhile back I posted an entry featuring porn photos that were touched up to make them safe for viewing.  Well I have found a video that does the same thing.  I can't explain it the best right now so I'll let the video do the work. 

I didn't do this update and need to clear out my bookmarks so I thought I would do something tonight when I usually do not post anything.  Oh and I just timestamped...I feel so dirty.

Well 2008 is over and 2009 is under way.  Let the madness begin.  I think January 20th will be one of those days never witnessed before and many embarrassing photos will be taken.  Here's a list of the 12 most embarrassing photos of 2008.  Did you make the list?

I love watching old sci-fi films and seeing what they predict the future will be like.  Here is a list of the 8 of the strangest predictions of what 2008 would be like.  How many of those would you want to be in today's world?  #2 would be suicide inducing.

Have you ever witnessed a rumor that caused mass trauma?  I remember that happening quite often in high school.  One time this girl said another girl performed fellatio on the majority of the football team and all hell broke loose and the girls were fighting and then the football team had a meeting with the coaches and the head...I couldn't resist...coach asked if the rumors were true.  Of course they weren't.  Anyway here are some rumors that caused some real world catastrophes. 

Here is Rolling Stones' list of the top 100 singles of 2008.  I wasn't too pleased with this list.  I have to check out The A/V Club's year end reviews in The Onion one of these days because this list is really sketchy.

This was one of my favorite lists:  the best and worst career moves in movies in 2008. 

Here is a list of the worst movies of 2008.  I have to agree with number 1.  We should replace the phrase, "jump the shark" with "nuke the fridge".  The recent Indiana Jones movie was so bad.

If you have ever had a U.S. History course, you may have run across the term "The Gay Nineties" describing the 1890s because of the rapid wealth gain.  Well 2008 may just be the gayest year ever.  Here is a list describing why.

The Village Voice put out a review of the year in pictures that may be not safe for work.  I didn't make it through the list but it was entertaining for a year end review.

I love this list: the best cat videos of 2008.  Why is it that the Christian the Lion video makes me misty eyed?  Maybe because he got more hugs than I do?

I hope when you view this link it works.  Someone at The Onion is selling something on eBay.  He's selling a joke.  How awesome is that!  Here I am giving it away for free. Well, I do it because I love all my readers and I won't sell out....yet.

New Year's Resolution:  Buy Legos and make strange things.

I was looking up information about action movies and found this list about what makes a movie manly and why they are flawed.

I can't believe this story.  Didn't they hear the guy?  Well it has made me check my attic and garage every day.

I am trying to figure out if this is real but I don't want to download anything.  Is it because FireFox is geared for Native Americans?

Ladies, would a guy setting himself on fire on the first date impress you so much that you would want to go out again? 

First look at the URL and tell me that this is not the simplest website you have ever seen.

So Viagra is helping us in our foreign relations...not that type of relations.  Viagra is helping us win the hearts and minds of Afghanis. 

As you know from my usual Wednesday posts, I enjoy comic books.  I have been reading The Watchmen and a thought crossed my mind: are there people out there that are superheroes or at least pretending to be heroes?  Well Rolling Stone did an expose on real life superheroes.

I was surfing around The Village Voice and found this interesting article about the author of the "Left Behind" series.  He wrote a Christian's guide to sex.  It's hilarious and scary.  There is an excellent comparison to Sauron located in that article.

I was going to do this in one of my "parody" updates but I thought I would include it now.  This is for adults only.  It's a feature on all the Star Trek porn parodies out there.  Some funny stuff.

I was watching TV today and saw an Esurance commercial featuring one of my favorite bands, Cloud Cult.  I looked on the website and they have the commercial and links to Cloud Cult sites.

Well that is it for this week.  Hope you enjoyed.

You can learn a lot from watching porn.  Here are just a few observations that I have made over the years.  These may not be applicable to real life.

1.  Women wear high heels to bed.
2.  Men are never impotent, no matter their age.
3.  When going down on a woman, 10 seconds is more than satisfactory.
4.  If a woman gets caught masturbating by a strange man, she will not scream with embarrassment, but will insist he has sex with her.
5.  Women smile appreciatively when splat them in the face.
6.  Women enjoy having sex with ugly, middle aged men.
7.  Women moan uncontrollably when giving oral.
8.  Women always have an orgasm at the same time as a man.
9.  A blow job always gets a woman out of a speeding ticket.
10.  All women are loud in bed.
11.  Back in the 1970s, people couldn't have sex without a wild guitar solo in the background.
12.  All breasts are real.
13.  A regular and enjoyable sexual practice is when a man takes his half-erect penis and slaps a woman in the face with it.
14.  When a man has an orgasm, he will always say, "Oh yeah!"
15.  If there are two men having relations with a female, they most certainly always high-five each other and the woman is never offended.
16.  Double penetration makes women smile.
17.  For some reason Asian men do not exist.
18.  If you happen across a couple having sex in the bushes, the male will not tell you to get lost but will insist that his girl's mouth is ready.
19.  There's plot.
20.  Slapping a woman on the butt is always excitable for the woman involved.
21.  Besides giving medicine, nurses give other jobs to male patients.
22.  Men always pull out.
23.  When your girlfriend catches you in bed with her best friend, she won't be angry, but will join you in the festivities.
24.  Headaches do not exist.
25.  When receiving oral pleasure from a woman, men it is pertinent that you remind them to "suck it".
26.  Everything is always clean.
27.  Men ejaculating all over a woman's body is a satisfying result for all parties involved.
28.  Women are always surprised when opening a man's pants to find out that he has a penis.
29.  Men never have to beg.
30.  Pigtails=handlebars.

Here are some more that I have thought of as well as some others that have left suggestions in the comments.

31.  Hitch-hiking is glamorous and always results in sex.

32.  Pizza delivery boys and repairmen are the greatest jobs a man could wish for.

33.  Pizza delivery boys and repairmen always have sex when they deliver or make house calls.

34.  All food in porn movies is nothing more than another sex toy.

spicyhotcoffee

35.  Women enjoy getting slapped with penises

36.  All lesbians are “girly”

37.  All lesbians carry bags filled with sex toys

38.  All stockings are crotchless

39.  Baby oil and saliva are acceptable lubricants

40.  All women are hairless

41.  Playing with globs of saliva is sexy

OneBadMother

42.  All women are ready to jump in the sack with anyone at anytime.

43.  Big penises make up for lack of personality

44.  Normal penis size is 12” and anything less is unacceptable

45.  Ron Jeremy and John Holmes are somehow sexy and appealing to women

46.  The majority of female porn stars are rail thin, fake tanned, with humongous boobs. 

Joeyj1220

47.  If there is more than one woman in the scene they will inevitably get it on while the guy enjoys. But if there is more than one guy in a scene they NEVER get it on while the girl enjoys.

curiousdwk

48.  Females have an infinite amount of spittle

If there are any observations that you have, please share.  This entry comes to you this evening instead of a porn movie update.