March 24, 2011
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BLOGATHON (Question for Christians)
So this is my blogathon post for this day. Here are my others: Mischief and Wisconsin Town Names.
Is the blogathon working? Am I raising money? Are you raising money? I like money and I bet you do too. We should totally hang out. Those aren't my questions.Here's the question part.
Imagine yourself as a pastor in a small Midwestern town. You are pastor of a congregation that has 300 members. You have been a pastor of this congregation for about 5 years. A member of your church who hasn't been an active member has started to return to church after 10 years of being a delinquent. This member is a third generation member and his family was one of the founding members of the congregation. This particular member is quite different. He is a cross-dresser and insists that he wear women's clothing to church. You have been approached by numerous members who are offended by this. You've talked to the member and he refuses to change and continues to wear women's clothing to church and church functions. You present this to your church council and they tell you it's OK but the council consists of the cross-dresser's family. People are declaring that they are planning on leaving your church if this continues and this is not a small contingent of people that plan on leaving.
OK, pastor, what do you do?
Tomorrow, you'll find out what I would do.
Here's what happened...the pastor resigned. He was offended, numerous members were offended and the cross-dresser continued to dress in this way and he was doing so even though he was causing members of the church to give offense. He was not showing love for his fellow Christians. I went through something similar with an eyebrow piercing. I realized that people were offended by it so when I was at church functions I wouldn't wear it. I did not want that to come in between the word of God and the members. Were they at worship to focus on the word or was something I doing causing them to stray? 1 Cor 10:32-33, 2 Corinthians 6:3
Comments (32)
Ban the cross dresser from Church. If you want to participate in a certain institution, you must follow the rules and regulations set by the people in charge. Simple. It's not discrimination, it's standard and law (for the particular subject at hand only of course).
Retire
@JinnLedet -
That's very much discrimination. Would Jesus ban him from church?
@Saridactyl - Our level of tolerance and Jesus's is different. If you thought Jesus was "God", then you have no right to compare your skills in judgement to his. But technically, you'd have to go for the group interest and the standard reliant in order to deviate the correct choice. It's like talking on the phone during a speech; no one has anything against phones, but it's just not allowed there. Same with cross dressing; you don't have to particularly have something wrong with cross dressing; it's just not allowed in there.
@JinnLedet -
Last I checked Christianity was about living by example. You're suppose to love others as Jesus did, not turn them away because of ignorance. If you can honestly say you would turn someone away from a church and in the same breath say that's the right thing to do then you really need to read the red parts of the bible.
What about turning someone away from a church is letting Christ be seen through actions? If anything that would turn someone off to Christianity. You don't have to agree with someone does, but when they come to a church searching for answers, according to the teachings of Jesus, the door should be open.
I really don't know. I wanna tend to agree with some of the people commenting but I just don't know. It's really a toughie.
go out and stock the cupboards with pb and maybe some j as....it might be tighter times acomin? it sounds like a perfect example of the true risk a pastor must respectfully face- leading others in faith however obstinate they are. then go buy a tasteful blouse for next service. french blue for me...it will bring out my eyes.
I'd probably let him keep coming. I think people should look beyond the appearance and into the heart.
Is a dress code included in their mission statement?
"We hope to minister and share the love of Christ to those who dress appropriately? Everyone else can get lost.... or rather stay lost"
This should be interesting.
will read in the morning. It's been one of those day...thanks for stoppin on my page. It in my favourites so I will not forget. Good night..
I'd probably deliver a rousing sermon regarding how we are all human on the inside. They wouldn't turn aside a disabled person, or a hideous individual (which I would say in a much more politically correct manner, of course) or someone who wore tattered old rags because they had no money to buy clothes if they chose to worship at the church. Lots of churches have signs outside that say "All are welcome." If this was some such church, and there was no notice on the bottom saying "as long as you dress appropriately," (which I can't imagine there would be) then there's no reason why a cross-dresser wouldn't be allowed to worship there, too. Especially if he was not otherwise distracting from the service in general.
Back in the day, women used to have to cover their heads to go into a church (at least in Catholicism) and men had to remove their hats. That dress code was rescinded, so as long as the man wasn't wearing midriff-bearing tube tops and short-shorts, I see no reason why they shouldn't be allowed to worship.
@leaflesstree - oh, but I'm not really practicing in the slightest so I dunno if my opinion really counts...:)
Clergy who play politics are reprehensible.
This reminds me of the Catholic bishop in Massachusetts who gave that philandering womanizer Ted Kennedy an annulment after he and his wife already had 10 kids and had been married for years.
I was raised in a church so i know what a few of the pastors i met would have done. One would have told them they were not accepted in the church and the other would have told the members that he is god's child too and so therefore we must accept him as such.
This is a very intriguing question especially since Christians have such a high standard on things(to the point of extreme and severe judgment at times).
I would tell the congregation that ostracizing him from the church is hypocritical and doesn't represent an accepting faith. He is God's child, cross-dresser or not.
AND I MISS READING YOUR SHIT! By the way. Haha.
I agree with leaflesstree, I would certainly not turn him away and I would address the issue in sermon. I do not believe it is right to discriminate like that, and if I were a religious leader I would welcome all into my fold. If the fold in turn decides to reject me, that'll have to be the way it is, because there's no reason to act against what you believe in, just for approval.
and this is the reason I don't go to church.
@Saridactyl - It all depends on the intentions of the crossdresser in the end!
Truthfully, churches do have expectations of their members, and that usually includes at the very least an unwritten code of decency in attire. I would not let my daughter dress in spaghetti straps and short shorts to acolyte at church, for example. It would be disrespectful. People are expected to dress at least modestly, and so as not to draw undue attention to themselves. This man is making a choice to cross-dress - it's not like it's a disability or a deformity or he's poor and can't afford clothing. Of course we would welcome people like that, and we do.
I teach in a Christian school, and there is most definitely a dress code, for both the teachers and the students. They would not allow cross dressing, or midriff-exposing tops, or too-short shorts, or undergarments being shown, or purple hair. The reason is that it would be a distraction to other students and would draw undue attention to that one person who didn't dress appropriately. No one complains about it - if they want to go there, that's what they do to fit in and follow decency guidelines.
In the case of the cross-dresser, if he is drawing undue attention to himself by his choice of attire, and that's not the usual and appropriate attire for attending that particular church, and if it's upsetting people and causing parents to have to broach topics with their children they'd rather not have to bring up in a church setting (because children will stare, and ask questions...) Then I think it is up to that person, if they REALLY want to be part of that church, that they assimilate a little bit, for the common good. He shouldn't be judged on his clothes or appearance, but he will be, for cross-dressing, and if he doesn't want that kind of attention, then maybe he should tone it down and think of the larger, common good.
Pastor should ask have you seen my cock...? Hehe
Father o'conner keeps chickens behind the church in a coop. One sunday he goes to feed them and finds the cock's gone missing. He knows theres a cock fighting in the village so at mass he questions the congregation. "has anybody got a cock?'. All the men stand up. "no, no. I meant has anybody seen a cock?" All the women stand up. "No, no, no, that's not what i mean either. Has anybody seen my cock?" 16 altar boys, 2 priests and a goat stood up!
Do not likee feel free to delete...
On a more serious side...This is an excellent question. The answer I do not know..I do not understand why he can't tone it down for church... After all,church is a place of worship...either he is in or he is out...dress accordingly when attending church it's as simple as that. God these social agitator can really take some things to over and above the limit..
Encourage the cross dresser to come to church and let the others make their own minds up what to do.
would allow them to dress as they want. Church is supposed to be accepting of people, not ban them because they are "different" or not the cookie cutter christian. Jesus hung out w/ hookers, thieves, murderers... ya know... those "types"... but for some reason these days christians only know how to speak christianese & love the "perfect" types aka people w/ big pockets when the offering bucket comes around & who are socially acceptable.
what would Jesus do?
I think it's very hypocritical - whether he is a member of the family that runs the congregation or not. Not any different if somebody who was stinky/smelly off of the street came in and sat down next to the parishners...what's the diff? If you don't like him - don't sit by him....
He would stay and be accepted. "Love your neighbor as yourself." - Big Guns Upstairs
Let the cross dresser wear his/her Sunday prettiest, and hold the doors open for the quitters as they leave. Isn't it God's church?
I'd tell the church members to go eff themselves and get off their damned high horses.
In the nicest way possible of course...
Okay. If you want to quote the Scriptures about not wanting another person to "stray" because of meat eating or eyebrow piercing. But "stray" indicates going away from the right road. By accomodating to them, you are actually encouraging them to stray. They shouldn't mind an eyebrow piercing or even cross dressing. If it were to lead them to some place where they shouldn't go, then that would be straying. But they are the ones that are straying because of their self-righteousness. You have no responsibility to encourage the self-righteous to be judgemental to the point of their trying to alter another person's innocent behavior.
Don't use that "straying" verse with me, mister. I'll shove it back in that pious face of yours. (smile)
Good answer, but cross dressing and an eyebrow piercing are very different...at least in extremity of drawing attention.
I like money. We should get some Brawndo and watch Ow My Balls.
@NightlyDreams - Not to copy what you've said, but that truly is my answer as well.
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