I was looking through some of my old writings and every time I had something ready to go for Xanga I thought I better not post it.  I found something I wrote back in 2008 about my journey of belief and thought about sharing it but I think the whole "My road to such and such belief" has been overdone in the past couple of weeks plus I used it in my strange writing in which I wanted to talk about the time a crossdresser with the surname Christ popped into a store I was working and asked for a job application.  I think my strangest word doc that I was going to post was one word...Checkerman.  I haven't gotten around to writing out that story about Checkerman.  It's an odd one that's for sure.  I was also thinking of writing about the times I almost killed myself, not suicide, but from accidents but I think you've heard all of those.  I could write about how I am too lazy or addicted to Xanga to get up and change the lightbulbs in my overhead fixtures so I am sitting in the dark.  Well you're getting none of that.  You're going to look at these pictures and you will laugh and if you don't laugh then you have no heart.

Don't say you weren't warned.


I was just talking to someone about this the other day.  The only good thing about the white people coming here is they frequent our casinos.

Why couldn't they eat apples on Noah's ark?  Because everything came in pears.  I'm actually having a memory from Lutheran grade school.  I believe it was 3rd grade.  We were reviewing the previous Bible history lesson.  The teacher asked, "Who were Noah's three sons?"  No one raised their hands so she called on my friend Steve.  He said, "Shem...Japheth...and and and"  He sat there for a while and couldn't get the last one.  The teacher gave him a hint, "The third son's name is a type of meat."  Steve blurted out, "MEATLOAF!"

I'm single...just saying.

It's a hillbilly bluetooth.

I can't believe vegans and vegetarians would eat a living thing that has feelings.

People like that deserve to eat rocks, rocks that are thrown at them.

It is simply the best fucking omelette you will ever fucking eat.

Well...it was fun while it lasted.

What the hell happened?

This episode of Sesame Street is brought to you by the letters W, T, and F

Believe it or not, he's the real Slim Shady.

The new season of Mythbusters has been pretty interesting.

They call me Dr. Enuf.  I got the cure you've been thinking uff.

America, this is your future.  How fucked are you?