The other day on @bonmots site she was talking about how men didn't rush at the chance to watch Fried Green Tomatoes.  I replied that I enjoyed that movie.  Later on I realized I had broken a man law in that I admitted to liking a chick flick.  Then I got to thinking of other man laws.  Here are some I've found along the course of my life sentence being a man.

1.  Under no circumstance may two men share an umbrella
2.  It is OK for a man to cry for the following:

3.  If a man brings a camera to a bachelor party, he may be legally killed by the other party goers.
4.  Unless a friend murdered your family, you must bail him out of jail within 12 hours after he calls.
5.  If you know a guy for more than 12 hours, his sister is off limits.
6.  It is wrong to complain about the beer in your friend's refrigerator.  It is OK to complain if the beer isn't a suitable temperature.
7.  No man is required to buy a birthday present for another man.
8.  The strongest bladder determines pit stops on road trips, not the weakest.
9.  If a man stumbles upon other men watching a sporting event, it is OK to ask what the score is but not what teams are playing.
10.  If you have given a woman an orgasm then it is alright if you fart in front of her.
11.  It is acceptable to drink fruity alcoholic drinks during the following situations:

12.  Only in situations of extreme physical danger are you allowed to kick another guy in the marbles
13.  The only time it's OK to fight naked is if you are in prison and you are protecting your ass.
14.  Never wear Speedos...EVER!
15.  If another man's fly is down, that's his problem.  Make sure your zipper is up and go about your business.
16.  Women who say they enjoy sports are spies and should be treated as such. 
17.  If you are in the company of a hot woman who is suggestively dressed, you must remain sober in case you have to defend her honor.
18.  Never hesitate when reaching for the last beer or the last slice of pizza but never both because that is plain greedy.
19.  If you compliment a man on his six pack it can only be about his beer.
20.  Never join your woman in gossiping about your friends unless she is withholding sex from you.
21.  Never talk to a man in a bathroom unless you are on equal ground i.e. both pissing, both crapping, both washing hands.  All other conversation must be limited to a nod unless on equal ground.
22.  Never let a phone conversation with a woman last longer than the amount of time it takes you to have sex with her.
23.  If you meet a girl for the first time and have sex that same night and feel guilty in the morning, that should not keep you from having sex with her before she leaves.
24.  It's acceptable for a girl to drive your car but it's not acceptable for you to drive her car.
25.  NEVER BUY A PINK CAR!
26.  If you ask your girl "What do you want for Christmas" and she replies "If you loved me then you'd know what I want" it is permissible to buy her an XBox.
27.  There is no reason a man should watch men's figure skating or men's gymnastics.
28.  It is not OK to admit that you enjoy a chick flick even if the movie involves cannibalism.
29.  If your best friend is dumped by a girl it is a 6 month waiting period till she can be touched. If he breaks up with her its a 6 day waiting period.
30.  When toasting with beers you clank with the bottom.
31.  If two or more males arrived at a party by a single car, and the driving male is hooking up with a girl, it is the responsibility of the other males to find other ways home.  (The exception to this law is if the driver is hooking up with his own girlfriend, the law is then void and the driver still holds full responsibility of driving his frinds home)
32.  Every man shall allow one empty urinal of separation in a bathroom with three or more urinals, law is void if there are dividers in between each urinal.
33.  When a man is borrowing a buddy's tool or other equipment, if the borrowee puts any scratches or brings it back with any noticeable wear, then he is required to do one of the following:

34.  Every man should watch sportscenter at least once a day, though multiple viewings are recommended so that one can hold his own in any debate on sports that may arise that day.
35.  Don't start a beer if you can't finish it.
36.  Men should know how to drive a stick shift.
37.  When riding with a fellow man...don't fuck with his radio unless granted permission.
38.  If a man is dumped by his girl, his buddies need to make sure he gets laid by an equally hot or hotter girl with in the week.
39.  No man may give himself a nickname (such as THE KING). It must be earned, and given to him by others.
40.  Men do not go shopping. We go buying.

Do you have any man laws to add?