I read your last assignment and once again enjoyed all your answers.  It truly is amazing what people are giving away on Craigslist.  It's also amazing what Maury asks his viewers.  @peridot21 asked if I was grading on the curve.  I don't know if I should because to me that's communism but I suppose this one time I could so...everyone gets an A-.

Here's your next assignment:

A.
  

B.
  

C.
  

Make sure you answer two questions clearly and concisely.  Answering all three questions gets you extra credit.

Now get to work.

A.  Youth, Roe, Love  well I hope that I could feel young again and fall in love but I'm not too sure about fish eggs.

B.  I think I'd like to hang with Joe Biden because this newspaper called The Onion really talks about him and none of the other news outlets report the stuff The Onion says he does.  I don't remember him drinking beer during the vice presidential debate but if they reported it then it must've happened.  I also would've loved to have seen him jump the motorcycle over the Vietnam memorial.  I'd probably also like to help him wash his Trans-Am in the White House driveway.

C.  I think there's a fine line between what you share.  Like if I told you I had a great day today because I had some extra relaxation that would be fine but if I said I had a great day today because I had an erection and this was odd because one of my medicines I've been taking has caused me to become Mr. Softee and I decided not to waste it and my orgasm was so intense from my furious masturbation session that I feel asleep before I could clean up that might be considered too much.  However some might think that's just fine to share that information.  It's almost on a case by case basis.

We were clad in just our birthday suits
You pulled on your black leather boots
“On your knees!” you commanded.
“Eat me now!” you demanded.
I guess this is how you treat new recruits

You have such a beautiful ass, if-
I am near it I can’t be passive
I will spring into action
And give you deep satisfaction
But heed my warning, my penis is massive

Makes the world go 'round
It's emotion in motion
Sex is exercise

There is one more book
It's not written by Adams
It sucks sweaty dong

Your unmatched success is astounding
The acclaim for your dates is resounding
But from all that I’ve learned
One thing has me concerned
Your pussy must take one hell of a pounding

That site worries me
It's so fun and addictive
Where I go to troll

Kids are idiots
Not everyone is that way
But a huge number

It’s too bad I’m hung like a mouse
I heard it all the time from my spouse
But you make me feel so manly
And since you treat me so grandly
I’ll buy you a house

That's Shakespeare in Love
Not a fan of that movie
Because of Paltrow

I watch pro-wrestling
How can women love this fact
Will think I am gay

You genuinely love your profession
Certainly you give me that impression
You get hundreds of bucks
For all the dicks that you suck
Growing rich in a recession

Have I become sick?
Black clouds hover overhead
Oh snap, it is on

I’m amazed how completely you know me
You are aware that I love when you blow me
I could not be more thrilled
When your sweet mouth I’ve filled
But please don’t feel obligated to show me

The things I would do
For some love right about now
Would make Steve O cringe

Here is your haiku
Eating people, robbing banks
That's the life for me

You take me in your mouth all the way
I just want to stay there the entire day
The feeling is exquisite
Each time that I visit
I so enjoy the time we get to play

thank you very much
Too dumb to be poetic
That's why I'm funny

your lips are so close
i can smell how they would taste
just lean in closer

The apartment walls seem very thin.
And we often raise up quite a din.
“Oh, no, we’re not banging.
It’s a picture we’re hanging.”
We lie to the neighbors and grin.

Be happy, be kind
Because others will see you
And judge your actions

I tried to think of baseball
It didn’t help me at all
I came as soon as you took off my pants

Oh Rick Santorum
I feel like he's just trolling
He can not be true

My mind's with the trees
with the fresh air and the seas
Must go somewhere new

My sharp wit has lost some of its keenness.
My deportment now shows hints of meanness.
What I’m certain I need
With all possible speed
Is the touch of your hand on my penis.