May 30, 2013
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Random Stuff
The 20 Most Powerful Man Names
1. Matt
2. Adam
3. David
4. Peter
5. Barry
6. Shawn
7. Timothy
8. Connor
9. Phillip
10. Taylor
11. Alex
12. Michael
13. Jonathan
14. Daniel
15. William
16. Colt
17. Lucifer
18. Blake Fistcrunch
19. Dirk Hardpec
20. Slab BulkheadTEN THINGS ABOUT YOURSELF
1. I chew my fingernails
2. I can’t remember my birthday so thatis why people forget it this year.
3. I am not the largest cephalopod onearth.
4. I never have made a girl fart throughsilk but it is a goal
5. I cry when I watch certain movies.
6. Even though I am 6’2” and even thoughsome consider that tall, I feel short.
7. I am so Raven
8. I think I’m addicted to the internetbecause I’ve started using internet lingo in my regular speaking.
9. Even though I don’t display it, I amrather musical.
10. Lately I’ve been seeing how long Ican go in a day without speaking English. Typing is another story.NINE THINGS YOU’VE THOUGHT ABOUT RECENTLY
1. What would the world be like without me andwould it be better off?
2. I think I should finally tell her howI feel.
3. No, I won’t say anything because Ilike her in my life as a friend and don’t want to lose that.
4. Boobs
5. Why do people enjoy anallingus
6. Tornadoes suck ass
7. Why are people so enamored by realityTV? Your life is reality and there is noway I’d watch my life on TV because it’s boring or at least parts of it areboring and not TV worthy.
8. Why do people de-friend me onfacebook? Oh well, no loss but seriouslyI’m not that difficult to love.
9. Why am I single?EIGHT WAYS TO WIN YOUR HEART
1. Give me attention
2. Laugh at my jokes
3. Like me for me
4. Dress up like a cheerleader
5. Do math
6. Boobs
7. Dance like they dance in the CharlieBrown cartoons.
8. Wear that one perfume I likeSEVEN FAVORITE SONGS YOU’VE HAD
1. Wish You were Here- Pink Floyd
2. Keep Me in Your Heat for a While-Warren Zevon
3. Gigantic- The Pixies
4. Army of Me- Bjork
5. Given to Fly- Pearl Jam
6. Nowhere Man- Pearl Jam
7. 10,000 Lakes- Kid DakotaSIX THINGS TO DO BEFORE YOU GO TOBED
1. Laugh at Darko Milicic.
2. Watch Adult Swim.
3. Eat some fruit
4. Check my phone
5. Brush teeth.
6. Ponder my future.FIVE THINGS YOU DO ON YOUR DAYS OFF.
1. Xanga
2. Boobs
3. Weep
4. Vidja games
5. Realize that this will not find meloveFOUR THINGS YOU’RE DOING RIGHTNOW.
1. Listening to Family Guy
2. Braiding my chest hair
3. Wondering what happened to Tim Tebow
4. Trying to figure out how to play thesad walking away music from The Incredible HulkTHREE THINGS YOU’RE SCARED OF
1. Birds
2. Dying alone
3. Kidney failureTWO THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOUDIE
1. Be loved
2. Participate in a month longintergalactic orgyONE CONFESSION
1. The word "love"doesn't necessarily mean shit to me.
Sure, they have to put something I'm allergic to where I live.
His shirt says "She wants the D". I guess that means "She wants the disaster relief".
Oh, honey girl, you better work.
Well, are you? Or since it's almost over...did you?
A man defeated
I loved the new season of Arrested Development but I was sort of upset there wasn't any chicken shenanigans although George Michael was about to do his chicken but didn't quite get to it. I hope there is another season.
Yeah...pretty much life right now. I was going to do an entire post about my health but I'll sum it up. "Oh, hey, I gotta take a dump." *sit on toilet, opens ESPN Magazine, relaxes, explosion* "OH MY GOD WHAT WAS THAT?!?!" *explosion subsides, relaxes, switches to Maxim Magazine, explosion* "OH DEAR LORD WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?!?!?!" *cries, pain intensifies, breathes like I'm in labor, wipes, stands up, sees toilet bowl full of blood, faints, wakes up minutes later, cries, pain, flushes* Then I'll just be sitting around and have pain stomach pain and then start vomiting what is probably stomach bile or acid or whatever the hell it is. This was all going on years ago and the doctors couldn't figure out what was wrong. They think my pain is from ulcers now but they can't figure out why I'm losing so much blood and why I'm anemic and why I have little to no iron or potassium and why some of my blood cell numbers resemble those of a cancer patient. Fun times, people, fun times.
Well I better get going, I have a lot to accomplish tomorrow. I wish I had the medical marijuana because that might help with the pain. At least let me have some Flintstones Chewable Morphine.
Sorry I had nothing better
Comments (13)
Jesus, my friend has gastrointestinal problems and can't shit. A different friend has IBS and farts 160 times a day. Hope your doctor finds out what's wrong and can fix it.
YOU HAVE ASS CANCER.
Also, I'm so relieved I am not the only one with an irrational fear of birds.
if tornados suck ass, its gotta be good enough for people?
I'm naming my first son Dirk Hardpec. Forget giving him a Slovak name when this one is sooooo much better!
Why the eff is Kimchi in that picture of Wisconsin and food names? Shouldn't Wisconsin just be beer, bacon, and cheese?
Holy explosive shit. I hope they figure something out to cure you!
Geesus babe, you better start feeling better and your body better start behaving. I demand it!
I remember your birthday! But I have a weird thing about birthdays, like once I learn them, I can't forget them. I still remember the birthdays of a bunch of people I hate. I wish I could delete useless crap like that from my brain... file it under "shit that will never be useful ever again but won't go away" along with my 300some digits of Pi, I guess...
Oh god I hope they figure out how to help you soon. That sounds awful! I love the names Connor and William.
I'm surprised that Dirk Hardpec beat out Slab Bulkhead. Slab Bulkhead is the manliest name EVER. (Well, after Matt, of course.)
Height perception, I think, is related to people and things around you. I'm 5'4, which compared to you is short. Compared to other people is tall. Whenever I wear heels I feel tall, even if I'm hanging around taller people, because suddenly things like chairs and tables are farther away from me.
Tell her you love her in an anonymous message. I don't know what that will accomplish but that's my suggestion.
Hope you feel better, that sounds awful!
Sorry your feeling so bad. I hope they figure out what's causing you to loose blood. Weather it's an ulcer or some other reason. You don't sleep walk? I just had some random thought you could be swallowing strange things while sleep walking or something similar. I saw a show a while back where people danced and drove around and acted really weird and they were all asleep doing in.
I think 'Max Headroom' is a great name. And 'the Doctor' is PFG too!.
Hope your bum is better. Really.
This was interesting and fun to read!
I always thought the male names Matthew and Michael were the best...just something about them...but, now I'm thinking about Dirk Hardpec.
Aw.
I'm sorry to hear you are still having such serious health issues. 
I hope and pray that find out how to help you soon.
I'm not scared to die...but I don't want to die alone. That's been on my mind for forever...and because of that I've been at the bedside of many dying people...if they had no one to sit with them in their last weeks, days, I did. I didn't want them to be alone.
HUGS!!!
Man, the bathroom explosions and pain sounds just horrible! Dr's never fix anything though, they just 'practice' on you. Hope you are able to get some good care soon, and you start feeling better quickly.
And you must tell me where you are going to post your motivation when Xanga dies. I need motivation!