July 8, 2009
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Motivation
I hope everyone had a relaxing weekend. I forgot to mention that in my last post. I hope everyone was also safe and no one lost any digits.
This weekend I met a guy who holds a Christian belief that I thought was obsolete. He tried to tell me that everything in the universe revolves around the earth. No, he wasn't Catholic and no, I travel in a time machine to the 14th Century. This guy says that a pastor told him that was the case so that is what he believes. Now I'm not a big fancy city lawyer but I am a Christian and nowhere in the Bible does it teach that the universe revolves around the earth but it is a belief that some held and apparently some still hold because in the Bible's account of creation, mankind is created last and therefore the masterpiece and the apple of God's eye and therefore everything revolves around us. I laughed and said that even at my Lutheran grade school and high school and college, they taught that the solar system revolves around the sun. The guy wouldn't have any of it because his pastor was right and no other pastor or teacher could change his mind. He claimed to be Lutheran but I called him a Ba-a-a-a-a-ptist.
While I'm talking about religion...people from Revelife, I don't mid you coming to my site. I practice Chrsitianity although since I left the ministry I am no longer what some of you might call a "true" Christian even though I have a badge here on Xanga that says I'm true. What I don't like about you people with the Revelife extensions on your screen names visiting my blog is how you get here. I do adore the female form and I am not ashamed of God's creation so on occasion I post photos that feature nudity. Well it creeps me out when you come to my site looking for "tits" and "pussy" and "blow job" and "fat ass" and "big floppy donkey dicks". If you are going to look at porn, log-out of your revelife account first. Better yet, create an alternate Xanga account for your porn surfing. Just some tips because you don't want me commenting on your pages asking if you enjoyed looking at big floppy donkey dicks on my page.
I watched the Michael Jackson memorial today or at least I had it on in the background while I did my work. I am just sickened by all this. Maybe we should change the heliocentric theory and just admit that everything revolves around Michael Jackson. I mean he's more important than anything happening in Iran...more important than the escalating violence in China...more important than our President claiming that we could not withstand a missile attack from Russia...more important than our vice President claiming that they "misunderestimated"(I miss Bushisms) the severity of the economy...Jackson is more important than the Israeli army pirating ships bound for Gazan relief and not to mention former congresswoman Cynthia McKinney who has been kidnapped by the Israeli army in an effort to keep people from getting basic supplies...an alleged pedophile who used his massive amounts of money to keep people from going to the authorities is more important than the 4 year anniversary of the London terrorist attacks...MJ is more important than G20 and the riot police being given greater powers in order to handle rioters...a drug addict is more important than a United States solider who lost his life in service of this great country...he is more important than hundred of thousands fleeing Mogadishu because of violence between government and guerrilla forces...Michael Jackson is way more important than our Congress and Senate issuing an official apology for slavery. I am such a fool to want to know the happenings of my world and what could affect my life instead of the non-stop coverage of a child molesting drug addict and guess what....IT WON'T END NOW THAT JACKSON HAS BEEN PLANTED! The will is being challenged and I am sure there will be a child custody case and then of course watch for the authorities to go after all the doctors that were writing him prescriptions. Yes, "news" has taken a major setback.
Here's your weekly dose of motivation, now that I have gotten that off my chest.
Two of these, in my opinion, are the best demotivational posters ever. In fact, when I found both, my fits of laughter brought tears to my eyes. Can you guess which two? I think by now some of you know my twisted sense of humor.
Comments (63)
hehe the BO "Socialist" one is the best
Poor Bambi... D;
geez Lily Allen with pink hair! yuck! lol
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!! OMG the B12 had me in stitches. And the Joker one scared the shit outta me!
BINGO!!! You get to be Pope, now we know what they do behind the locked doors!!
Big donkey dicks? I must have missed that post.
If you watch too much of that cable news crap you will come to believe the world revolves around Obama.
I wonder why bambi is bleeding from his butt?
maury povich x2 rofl
Before long, they'll just give Cynthia back. They'll realize she isn't even close to the effort. Yet another notion on their fail post.
the Michael Jackson paragraph made me spit out all my water. Hilarious!
I second your Michael Jackson thoughts.
lot's of lolz.
@Paul_Partisan -
I like that one as well because it is so true. All these people who are hoping that Obama fails are actually saying they want America to fail.
@milubbles -
It is a better fate than what happened to Bambi's parents.
@no1charmerlondon -
Lily Allen could have any color of hair and I would still love her.
@SladeTheGreyFox -
Yes...that B12 one was one of these posters that had me in tears. Once I get over the fear of the girl Joker, I realize that those lips could make for a lot of pleasure.
@bosefius -
The high stakes bingo games are teh true secret of the Vatican.
@godfatherofgreenbay -
Lol, I still like that movie. I think it was my favorite movie of all times. Besides Lion King. That one came out in '94, though, when I was born. XD
@ElevenStones -
I think the donkey dicks came in with a quote from a movie.
I think the reason why that deer is bleeding from the butt is because that is the one I hit with my Blazer whose backside got broken shards of my bug guard.
@Wing_zero21 -
I had to have two times the Maury because he is such a pimp.
@MrsMok -
Yes, I know Cynthia McKinney is way out there with regards to her belief that American soldiers were deployed to New Orleans following Hurricane Katrina to murder African Americans who had not sought shelter. And yes she was strange that her campaign for the presidency was centered around the American public killing two birds with one stone in electing her as the first African American and female president. But she was an elected member of our government and our "ally" Israel should not be holding her captive. I would feel that way about any politician from America who is held captive even if it was Dick Cheney. Yes, I don't like him but he's our dick.
@its_me_katie -
I hope I didn't ruin your keyboard if you spat out your water. That has been boiling inside me since he died and since the funeral was over it was time to unload.
@whoaaa_electro -
I have remained calm and kept quiet because I knew if I spoke about MJ it would be bad. Unfortunately this saga will be going on years from now.
@Olyachka -
Thanks...these are my favorite posters. I need to get a few made into actual posters for my classroom.
@milubbles -
I saw Bambi when I was a little kid but I didn't remember it. So one time I was babysitting a little cousin who was three or four at the time and he wanted to watch a movie instead of going to bed. I asked which movie he wanted to see and he selected Bambi. Well not remembering the content, I put it in and we watched. Bambi's parents(I can't remember now) die and he starts bawling asking, "Why'd they have to die?" I said calmly, "Because Bambi didn't go to bed when they told Bambi to go to bed." He ran up stairs, tucked himself in, and fell right asleep. That was about 10 years ago and since then his parents claim they have never had problems getting him to go to bed.
@godfatherofgreenbay -
She also looks like a horse
@MrsMok -
Well so does Sarah Jessica Parker but that doesn't stop me from having the occasional...oops too much..so how is your summer going?
@godfatherofgreenbay - But what if they promised to give him the Eichmann treatment?
You've got to be kidding about that guy! Is it bad that I skipped your whole paragraph on MJ? I've avoided most of the coverage, yay.
Lilly Allen was really pretty with pink hair, she should have kept it. That scientology one really made me laugh.
@godfatherofgreenbay -
not to cynthia! please. I know you like all spectrums of the rainbow, but not her. however occasional it might be. come now, matt! summer is looking up. it's taken two months to bypass drama to get to this point, but that's how the cookie crumbles. how are the summer months treating you?
@TiRocKiinPiinK -
No I am not kidding and it is sort of scary to know there are people who still think that way in the world.
I commend you for avoiding the whole Michael Jackson media circus. It must be difficult.
Yes, I really enjoy Lily with the pink hair and Scientology makes me laugh in and of itself.
@MelFamy -
Cheney? Well I guess I wouldn't mind and I wouldn't balk at his captors using the torture methods Cheney signed off on during his reign as president...I mean vice president.
I agree with what you said about the Michael Jackson memorial.
@godfatherofgreenbay - anyone that can tell everyone who their daddy is is most definetly a []D [] []V[] []D !!!
@godfatherofgreenbay -
Awww. XD Poor kid!
@kachino -
I had to take some of what I had originally written because on second read, it was quite harsh. Once I calmed down I also realized that some of the things I wrote about weren't so bad.
Yeah, I think I read somewhere that 8 television stations were streaming his memorial live... Crazy coverage. I'm taking an elective journalism course for fun, and we started discussing the integrity of journalism. It's not uncommon for something else behind the scenes that controls/influences the type of new content that we receive (i.e. big corporations, etc). Anyways, that would be a long discussion, but I wanted to share something with you that you might like, so if you dont't already have this one, enjoy! ... http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Dj9Wvlgz6sk/SM8hQHAwHiI/AAAAAAAABJw/0zq7JD4rInQ/s320/Bullshit.jpg
@mZdejavuZ -
The thing that has upset me about this all is how the drugs that Jackson took that probably killed him have been some of the biggest searches on Google. Also since his death his album sales have shot up. It's clearly a ploy to get people to go out and buy cds and help revitalize the struggling music industry. Do you remember when Elizabeth Smart was kidnapped? I think she was taken right out of her room. Anyway that summer CNN had non-stop coverage and then during commercial breaks and I swear that it was every single commercial break they had ads for home security systems and that industry had record numbers. There is this pharmacist that lives in my town, I actually grew up across the street from him. Anyway a few years ago the local media went nuts with a story of how a gang of crystal meth addicts was going from pharmacy to pharmacy and robbing all the sudafed and other ingredients for meth. Well then they started staking out the pharmacists and breaking into their houses to take them to the pharmacy at gun point to get all the sudafed. Anyway this guy in my town has like motion sensors everywhere and has home security systems and even a cameras at all his windows and doors.
Re your MJ tirade. I agree. Which is why I claim that this is not the Information Age - it is the Age of Entertainers. If I asked any high school senior to name me 20 people who earn over a million dollars a year, they could do it easily. And every one of them would be an entertainer - a sports figure, a pop musician, an actor/actress, etc. And for each one of them, the entertainer's education meant nothing, it means nothing if they are good people or despicable people, it means nothing if they are articulate or dumb (actually you may wish they were dumb - by shutting up), and it means nothing if they have any wisdom to dispense or not. And yet these high school kids can not only name them, but can tell you all about them. It is the age of Entertainment.
I believe in a Higher Power. God or whatever you choose to call him, though I don't really like to say I'm Christian simply because to me some of the beliefs are waaay out there. Lutheran or Baptist...doesn't matter the choice, just the fact that a generalization of Christianity...it scares me sometimes what people will believe because a "pastor" or "priest" or "reverend" tell them it is SO. *shrugs* That is just my humble opinion.
Revelife coming to look a nudie pics? NO WAY.. I can't believe. *Says in the utmost sarcasm* LOL!
Being a fan of MJ's I can't agree with you here. I think he deserved few hours of recognition on the day they lay him to rest. He brought people closer together with is monumental music. People in Iran, China, Isreal, and here were all alike when they listened to his music, because you can believe he has fans EVERYWHERE.
Do I think that all the news on those issues and places should stop, no not at all. Not even close to what I'm saying, but I am saying I think he totally deserved 5 hours of respects, on his day of rest. And all the stuff about him being a child molester, I have opinions about but none of which would sway you I'm sure, because I'm sure like many others that feel your way, nothing can really sway you to feel differently. But that aside, whether he did or didn't do it, the man was a music icon and genius...and NO one on this earth will ever be able to bring things together like him again, he broke so many barriers with his music when it came to racial difference. So he should be remembered for his music and not his personal life.
((This doesn't mean I don't like you because you have ill feelings toward him. Hehe, a lot of fans would simple delete you from the list. I'm not like that. I like what you have to say and you have been kind to me. You are cool in my book. I love that you voice your opinions no matter what they state. So, you get a rec' from me.))
LOL...
@curiousdwk -
That was a problem I faced when teaching kids. You would ask them who their hero was and they would come out with sports stars and you would ask why and you'd get a simple, "He puts the ball in the hoop," or "She sings," or "He or she makes a ton of money." I guess that is what we get for living in a capitalistic society. The kids could care less about what despicable acts a person commits just as long as they make a pile of money. My first experience with this came when Allen Iverson of the NBA was being charged with all these counts of spousal abuse and then was implicated in other attacks and murders. The kids adored him because he made money from the NBA and rapping. It was sickening. I always told the kids that if they were solely basing their hero search on money then they should look at Warren Buffet or Bill Gates.
@sle21408 -
Yeah, I understand what you are saying. I can't stand when people say, "The Bible and God says..." Do they know that for sure? Have they read the original language that the Bible was written in or are they reading a translation or a paraphrase? Yes, I have had hundreds of people with the revelife address come through my photo section looking for a sundry of pornographic images. It is creepy how tehy reach my site but oh well traffic is traffic.
I agree with his musical ability and that his iconic stature does require a fitting memorial but the constant non-stop coverage from the day of his death until the day of his funeral was needless. It was just like with Anna Nicole. I mean what did she do? Playboy? Cinemax low-budget soft-core porn? A reality series? Then the ensuing drama with her daughter was senseless and some tv journalists are promising that the saga with Michael Jackson is just beginning. That is horrible. The children are going to suffer. There's no if ands or buts about that, the children will suffer and then they will also be torn apart by the money situation and then will be bomarded with their news of their father's drug abuse and will also have to face the probable trials for all the doctors that were writing him prescriptions. When Presidents Ronald Reagan, Gerald Ford, and Richard Nixon died, they never received that press coverage and they, at one point in their lives, were the most powerful men in the world. I do think our country and media has its priorities in the wrong place. I value your opinion and I respect your opinion. I just can't agree with the media attention that MJ has received especially over such important matters that have been transpiring and have been cloaked by the media blackout of his death.
@MrsMok -
I know...I was just kidding. Cynthia is one of those images a guy could use to put off a climax sort of like how I think of baseball, Roseanne, or Whoopi Goldberg. And you are right, I'm like Crayola.
@RestlessButterfly -
Thank you
Found a site you might like
http://thechive.com/2009/07/its-friday-you-could-use-some-motivation-17-photos/#more-42916
At the bottom are more links to pages featuring more motivation posters
@godfatherofgreenbay -
what? rosie and whoopie don't make your fingers blue? well...what about if they were to have a love child? yeah yeah??? :]
@its_me_katie -
Ah...thank you! I love those posters.
@godfatherofgreenbay -
I was browsing through the iTunes store the other day, and I saw that the top album, top ringtone, and top music video was MJ's. And, yeah, I would not be surprised if there were people who would exploit his death to get sales... And, that's a pretty crazy story about those pharmacists and sudafed...
@mZdejavuZ -
I went to Walmart today and it was because I was looking to buy supplies to install a pole in my bedroom but that is another story. anyway in the entire store there were only 5 MJ cds left. 4 of the Ones album and 1 Thriller. The funny thing is that they had them all right next to the check out counters.
@godfatherofgreenbay -
Ah, so you really were serious when you mentioned your weekend project! =P LOL But wow, they've strategically placed his albums in the "now-or-never" impulse purchase spots.
@mZdejavuZ -
OK so maybe not to buy but more or less to find out if I could buy them. It is amazing what you can find at Walmart...that's all I'll say.
They are notorious for that. When Johnny Cash and Ray Charles died, their cds were right next to the check outs. The same goes with actors and actresses who pass away. Their merchandise is pushed to the front of the store so people will see it and feel compeled to buy it. Oh and this one I went to also has a section in the front that is filled with products labeled As Seen on TV. This time it was filled with all the stuff Billy Mays was selling.
did you run into the sun-revolves-around-the-earth guy online or in person?
Because if it was online I think I know who you're talking about. Last week I had a really long conversation (because I love easy wins) with someone who truly believed that the sun revolves around the earth (he argued that Earth could not be moving based on our scientific observations), Planned Parenthood was "invented" to exterminate the babies of blacks and "yellows" (I'm unsure if he was referring to people or wasps), evolution is racist and he can prove it because they supposedly presented charts during the Scopes trial that categorized the races by superiority or inferiority (of course, he could provide no evidence of this and couldn't even tell me which side during the Scopes trial had presented these charts) and Darwin himself made some racists statements so this proves evolution is racist (and he was not confusing the man with the theory, thank you!). Oh, and Darwin not only created evolution, a racist theory, but he literally created racism itself! Racism did not exist before Darwin's birth. Slavery was not racist; people were just victims of circumstance.
God, people scare me.
@ithiliya -
Sadly, I met this man in person. I was at a Bible study and science in the Bible was being discussed and I brought up how some people try to explain science using the Bible even though the Bible is silent on those matters. No where does the Bible mention that the sun revolves around the earth. I don't get people.
Some of those shit-kicker political analysts here on xanga are so horrible. I cringe when I read their blogs because it seems that they haven't moved past 4th grade as far as their writing ability is concerned. That really scares me that someone believes that Darwin created racism and evolution...wait, I have heard so many Christians brag up the fact that Darwin later became a Christian so maybe that is why certain church bodies promote racial discrimination or indoctrinated their "little brown brothers" with violence and torture.
@godfatherofgreenbay -
I pointed out to him the racist atrocities that were done in the name of God, including slavery and segregation, not as a all-Christians-are-racist thing (in fact, I even stated that it's a human problem, not a religion or anti-religion problem) and his response was just "well, they were corrupted". Pfft.
@ithiliya -
I love how so many Christians think they are without "sin" and that any Christian who sins is not a "true" Christian.
@godfatherofgreenbay - I've got another one for ya. I was reading a blog that posted that whole "Joe Republican" thing where a fictional character named Joe ironically blasts liberals while enjoying all the things liberals had fought for, like decent wages, weekends, clean water, cheap medication, blah blah blah. Anyways, me and helvetabrann have been talking to this guy... you may have seen the comments since we frequent most of the same blogs... who believes that an unbeliever can go to Heaven if you pray for his or her soul (he had left a comment answering the "Joe Republican" story by adding a cute one of his own that said something like "Joe Republican dies and goes to Heaven because a Republican had prayed for his soul when no godless liberal would.") Neither of us had heard of that before... I mean, I've heard of the faith versus deeds/acts argument but third-party prayer was completely new to me... and told him we didn't think that was part of any Christian doctrine. (Note: We said nothing about him being wrong, we didn't attack his religion, nothing like that; we just said that we didn't think that was actually believed by any Christian denomination.) The guy completely shut down, told us we were "bitching and moaning" about things we knew nothing about, and said the conversation was over until we both admitted we were assholes. That was a weird one!
@ithiliya -
There is a strange passage in the Bible, I believe in one of Paul's letters, where Paul says that a wife who believes can save her family with her faith. It doesn't mean that anything she does like jsut simply believing in Jesus as her Savior means her heathen family will be saved but if a person reads further they would realize is that the point Paul is making is that her actions and beliefs will rub off on her family and they will listen to her express her beliefs and they to will come to faith. I have heard so many Christians pray for unbelievers that they will be saved and they think that by praying for them that means the unbeliever will be saved and also the believer may get a better place in heaven. It makes Christianity into a religion of work-righteousness when that is not what Christ preached. Revelation only mentions that there are two believers that have a special place in heaven and then the group of martyrs, which begs me to question why more Christians aren't killing themselves for Christ. I read something on revelife today about how Christ said that if a body part caused you to sin, then you should cut it off. Well one hardcore Christian said that IF he sinned he would immediately cut off his offending body part. That guy must have the purest thoughts and must have never had a wet dream. He fails to read the bible in its entirety and read where it says we sin daily and are sinful.
@godfatherofgreenbay - It seemed like such a strange concept to me. I mean, to believe that your prayer sent a person to Heaven? That would mean that in the absence of that prayer, of course, no Heaven for you. So the difference between eternal damnation and eternal bliss is a random stranger dialing God's metaphorical phone number? How depressing is that!
I saw a little bit of the post you're talking about. Such replies aren't really that big of a surprise. I mean, I read one today where a woman was wondering what would happen if Jesus came to earth today... started a blog, maybe went down to the train station and spoke his message to a bunch of commuters, maybe joined a band to sing his message at concerts and such... and she asked her readers what they would do if they encountered Jesus in this day and age. Would they ignore him because of fear and doubt? Of course, no one has to imagine what they would do... if you've lived in or even just visited a big city, you know EXACTLY what you'd do. Ignore them and walk away from them just like every other crazy with a bullhorn! *LOL* I mean, there ARE people in the 21st century who claim to be Jesus! Men and women from practically every country, especially more liberal ones with freedom of speech... there's even a guy, I want to say in Mexico but I'm not sure, who has a TV show, a church, and a rather large following. He claims to be the Son of God. But if the woman who authored the blog met the guy from Mexico do you think she'd do anything but call him a blasphemer... you know, because of fear and doubt?
The worst part was buried in the middle, where she wondered if there was even a woman pure enough to bear Jesus in the 21st century. First of all, that's incredibly offensive because even by the archaic Biblical sense of the word, OF COURSE there are women "pure" enough! Just because Paris Hilton is a sl*t doesn't mean that every woman on the WHOLE PLANET is too. Second, I thought the whole point of Jesus was that he welcomed everyone... beggars, taxmen, prostitutes, everyone. Why must his earthly mother be a snow-white virgin who's been locked up from the sight of man her entire life?
@ithiliya -
See some Christians take a strange view of Mary. They think that because Jesus was born without sin, then she must not have sinned so I can see where that woman was wondering women today would be "pure". Mary was a sinner and she after Christ she "knew" men in the biblical sense.
@godfatherofgreenbay - I don't personally take offense to the concept that Mary was without sin. I actually like how much some Christians have elevated Mary, especially Catholics, almost to the status of Goddess. Christianity definitely lacks the feminine touch otherwise :)
Besides, there's something very calming about those Virgin Mary candles you can buy in the ethnic section of the grocery store
I just didn't like the assumption that there are no "pure" women... and by "pure" I don't mean sin-free of course.
I think tom cruise is one of them
@bryantomato -
It was the B-12 and And I Will Always Love You...I should reconsider the Tom Cruise one since I like to rag on Scientology.
@godfatherofgreenbay - aww. I will always love you was my second guess.
Comments are closed.