September 17, 2009
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Facts about Yours Truly
I can't sleep. I am so nervous about tomorrow and all the tests and how they may come back. I guess I shouldn't worry when I haven't been diagnosed before. Ugh...anyway I read a post the other day that said I had to post facts about myself if I read the post so here goes.
1. When I was younger I was able to slam dunk. Most people look at me and would think otherwise but being able to squat 700lbs and leg curl 300lbs helps develop the muscles needed for dunking.
2. At the height of their popularity, I wore nothing but Zubaz pants. During that year of school I don't think I owned even one pair of jeans.
3. I wear size 17(the American sizing chart) for my shoes. It is damn near impossible to buy shoes. Most shoe stores only carry to a 12 or 13. I have to go to a store that deals with the Wisconsin Badgers. I remember my shoe size was always a source of rumors on the bus. Yes, I rode the bus in high school. I lived away from home during high school and my parents wouldn't let me have a car because they couldn't keep tabs on the car if I was away. Anyway a group of girls asked me my height and my shoe size. I told them and then I heard giggling and then gasps and then muffled, "I really want to see it." I always tried to figure out their devil's math but they refused to tell me.
4. I once got drunk at a party. A friend and I coerced our designated driver to take us to a 24 hour grocery store. Once inside I was stumbling around. The dd tried to get me to sit down but I screamed, "I WANT CHEESE BECAUSE I'M FROM WISCONSIN!" The check out guy gave me one of the motorized carts and all hell broke loose. Driving up and down the aisles screaming, "Look at me!" My friend crashed his cart into a bread display and I started laughing so hard I cried. It was a fun time and I think our dd broke up with her boyfriend because she realized we were the type of people he hung out with.
5. I once wrote a pamphlet detailing how to survive a zombie attack.
6. I had chicken pox three times as a child. It has left my skin allergic to numerous things which include nickel, ink, and Ivory soap.
7. I currently have 3 piercings, two in my left ear and my eyebrow. I once had up to 8. 5 in the ear, eyebrow, navel and my thingee. I worried about infection and my thingee falling off so that one came out plus it hurt to walk. I accidentally ripped my navel piercing out and 3 of my ear piercings got really hard and my ear started growing over the studs so I took them out.
8. I enjoy movies. I have 1126 DVDs. Thank you Blockbuster for being unsuspecting about my rental activities and thank you to the inventor of DVD burners.
9. I admire James K. Polk. He accomplished all his goals as president in 4 years so he didn't seek another term.
10. I have a fear of birds. I was divebombed while on vacation as a kid and the bird crapped all over my face. Also, my aunt and uncle raised parrots and they would attack me. Birds hate me so I avoid them at all costs.
11. I have 8 myspace accounts and 3 facebook accounts. I enjoy making fake accounts even though it is against their terms. I only check one myspace account daily. I rarely use it anymore. I also creep out my students with myspace because I was a member before the "boom". I heard about it because I am such a devoted Weezer fan and Rivers Cuomo released "tomorrow" from Annie on his so I just had to hear it.
12. The hardest thing I ever taught in my teaching career was sex ed to sophomores. I taught it in a religion class so you can guess how we handled sex. Anyway two jokers ask me questions that stuck with me: "Mr. W, I'm a male and I know Jesus was a male and as a male certain things happen...well do you think Jesus ever got boners?" "Mr. W, is S&M sinful?" Maybe I should also include all the times I was asked if oral sex "counted".
13. I miss Hunter S Thompson and Kurt Vonnegut.
14. I was in choir for 7 semesters in college. And here are some of my choirs selections:
15. I have had 5 car accidents in my driving career. 4 of those accidents involved deer. I think it was some karmic thing because I hunt. When I shot my first deer, I ate its heart in the field so its spirit became a part of me.
16. I enjoy roller derby. I think it was more of a thing for seeing women fighting in roller skates and skirts. I dig the alternative look girls. I also dig ladies who work on cars. I'm weird.
Comments (55)
Hunter S Thompson was great. I actually read Fear and Loathing before I saw the movie. The funny part of that is I did 5 years after the movie came out.
"do you think Jesus ever got boners?" I love that question so much!
Sex ed to sophomores? Bless you. I can barely teach government to juniors! haha
Wow, you're really honest... but I think I like you. **Grin**
2. what are zubaz pants?
4. awesome!
7. i've got 11 piercings now.
and i find it a little odd that your piercing made it painful to walk...perhaps it wasn't pierced correctly?
8. whoa...
13. me too.
15. i've got 3, none of which involved deer. and i'm quite certain i'm much younger than you so i sort of feel that my license should be revoked for obvious incompetence behind the wheel.
awesomely interesting list ...and omg Zubaz? no wayyyy! lol ...i remember those too ...what were you (and every other guy) thinking when you wore those?? lol jkjkjk
:)
I didn't know you were a teacher, interesting.
i have a friend at work that pierced his thingie... he went around showing everyone pictures. he was such a dork to do that.
i would have laughed at your kids questions in sex ed. i wouldn't have been able to help it. they probably know more about sex than i do anyway so it wouldn't have mattered. kids know more about electronic stuff and sex than adults. they're more inventive. and have no fear.
why so many accounts?
This is a funny list!!
I seriously laughed really hard at #4. Great list!!! I've never hit a deer...I've come close a couple of times though :/
That's a lot of movies. I envy you.
Did you really eat the deer's heart? I thought people only did that in the movies.
"I have 8 myspace accounts and 3 facebook accounts. I enjoy making fake accounts even though it is against their terms."
how many xanga account, i'm guessing?
#8: I have Netflix to thank for the very same thing.
#16: Liking roller derby women and chicks who can fix cars is not weird. It's f'in HOT
And I'm not sure what you mean by "alternative look" girls specifically but I've always dug ladies with tattoos and facial piercings, and I adore most goth, victorian, steampunk, Indian (to throw a weird one in), and of course, Renaissance get ups 
And I'm talking RENAISSANCE, not Medieval. For those who can't tell the difference, Medieval is loose-fitting dresses with bell sleeves and a knotted cord around your waste. Booooring. Renaissance is bum rolls, tight bodices, corsets, or stomachers, hoop skirts, puffy sleeves, layers of skirts that tuck up to expose the skirts underneath them, seed pearls, peacock feathers, lace, and daggers. Yum 
Oh, and those tiny riding hats. I lurves me some tiny riding hats 
4. Priceless.
12. Is s&m sinful? lol. (nope)
13. My mom used to hang out with that guy. Said he was a lecher
so she quit hanging out with that crowd.
14. nice.
15. yep, karmic misfortune for you.
Good luck with your tests. I hope they come out well :]
I laughed so hard at your zubaz phase! How many girlfriends did you have that year?
Good luck with your tests.
Damn. I wish we lived closer. I'd love to just sit down and have a beer (or more) with you. (As long as you didn't get drunk and drive on a motorized chair - smile.) (I've never gotten drunk which I say not flaunting any virtue of mine, but just describing my lock on reality won't let me unlock.)
I can imagine you teaching religious sex ed to a bunch of Sophomores. I would have loved to have been a fly on the wall.
@Paul_Partisan -
I read Fear and Loathing in the 8th grade. It was an interesting experience. I was reading and my teacher asked what it was about and I nonchalantly said, "A motorcycle race."
@lonelywanderer2 -
I asked a pastor that because I didn't have an answer for the student. The pastor recoiled in disgust. I completely understand how a teenage boy would wonder because at that age they happen so involuntarily.
@iStephanieMarie -
It was very difficult and some of those evenings I didn't sleep because I was going through many "what-if" scenarios.
@BohemianLamb -
Well thank you. Honesty can be a good thing from time to time unless you have to teach religion to 5th graders and they ask you "What is a eunuch?"
So are you a Bohemian from the area of Bohemia? Or is the Bohemian the unconventional living?
@entendezmavoix -
Oh man Zubaz...I wish I could forget. They were this horrible fad in the early to mid 90s of zebra striped prints on pants but they also came in multiple colors sort of like how you could support your sports teams. I had a pair of green and gold because they were the packers colors. Here is the website so you can see for yourself. I can't believe they don't have more. Probably if you do a search you can find many more styles.
It was a fun time for me but I still feel bad for the guy because the girl broke up with him and I think it was because of me and my other friend's drunken antics. Oh well he is married to a different woman and happy.
I had that piercing done in a tattoo parlor in southern California. My cousin was a tattoo artist and he took me to visit after he took me to Tijuana. They wouldn't give me a tattoo because I was drunk so I went with the piercing. I think I was just paranoid about infection.
Yeah there was a point where I wouldn't watch TV and just watch movies.
They were great minds or something like that.
I think most of my accidents happened by the time I was 23. I haven't had one in a few years. Can't give away my age or else I will begin to feel old.
@Peridot21 -
I personally thought, "Hey, these are cool because they represent my favorite sports teams." I actually dug out a few pairs at my parents house. I want to bring them back.
@Afrostronomy -
Yes, I am or was or something in between. Mostly subbing to find full time positions. I almost lost my life teaching. A kindergartner wanted me to play soccer and when I said no he grabbed my tie and started swinging. It almost choked me.
@NightlyDreams -
You are so true about how much more kids know than us. I think when I was that age I knew just the basics and none of the extremely kinky stuff.
When I was pierced I never showed it off, not while at my religious school.
@Mac_Libureet -
Thank you
@crazy2love -
That was such an excellent night plus I had cheese.
It is really creepy hitting deer. It's like you have to really hit them to do damage. The first one I hit at about 65mph and I won't go into graphic details but I was shocked to see it go running into the woods.
I have always wanted to make my own movies so I watch them in hopes to one day make my own.
@ThatOneBlondeChick -
Yes, I ate it. Eating organs of freshly killed animals is big among Native American cultures so even though I only have a small bit of Ho-Chunk blood in me, I had to take part.
@maniacsicko -
The accounts I made on myspace were mostly for historical figures, a specific beer that I love, tv characters, and my cats. I think you have found me out on Xanga. Maybe I am one of the famous people and this is my blog where I can vent and show semi-dirty photos so I can live outside my do-good image or what is more likely is that this is my only Xanga.
@ithiliya -
I have often thought of joining netflix but I have friends that have it and to me it seems so cult-ish. I think they do secret rituals when they receive the movies and select movies they want to see.
Two words...suicide girls.
@godfatherofgreenbay - very good point... plus they're comfy!
:)
@BranmacFeabhail -
#4 was so much fun, I think everyone should have a chance to drive one of those carts, I see them in stores all the time and I always have that memory come back to me.
#12 thank you, that is more comfortable coming from you. I actually asked a pastor about it and he spent a long time discussing how certain positions may not be sinful as long as both members in the marriage agree with them...yes, S&M is perfectly fine as long as you are married. I wasn't about to ask about wife swapping.
#13 Which guy, I can imagine Hunter Thompson being like that.
#14 Thank you
#15 since I haven't hit one in years nor have I been hunting I think things are balanced
@its_me_katie -
Well I think you read how they turned out.
As for the Zubaz and girlfriends...yes I did have a girlfriend of course I think it was rigged because our parents were friends and we had known each other since as long as I could remember. Also back then you have to remember Zubaz were cool.
@curiousdwk -
Yeah we could have a beer or two at the haunted bar that I talk about so often.
My high school teaching...there are so many stories that I probably shouldn't retell here on Xanga but it was definitely an experience.
@godfatherofgreenbay -
i was an extremely niave kid. i didn't know what "do it" meant until i was 11 or so. kids now can tell you the positions and make a how to diagram lol
@godfatherofgreenbay -
12. Actually, most responsible practitioners of s&m, etc (or bdsm, if you want the umbrella term) are very careful about everything they do; mutual enjoyment is encouraged as long as both parties are comfortable with whatever it is they are doing, and usually have safe words/phrases. With the degree of care and concern for the other person's safety (and pleasure, let's not get too far from the point lol) that it takes to have a good s&m relationship, I cannot imagine that any of it is sinful as long as it is consensual and every precaution taken. [shrug] Although, our ideas of what is sinful may differ.
13. Vonnegut
@BranmacFeabhail -
Well I could care less what people do with their genitals. That is between them and their partner(s) and which deity they so choose to worship. I can't judge because I have done what some would call wrong.
Hmmm...I guess I only know Vonnegut through his writings. Who am I kidding? He's a man, of course he could be like that.
@NightlyDreams -
It's sort of shocking. I was in a Walmart not long ago and saw a group of girls who couldn't have been over 16 and all of them had live babies. At first I thought it was one of those parenting classes with the life-like babies but these were all real.
Allergic to ink? Wow.
@nattata -
Ink only bothers me when I get it on my skin. I will break out in a bad rash. For instance, I hand-wrote my latest "girl" entry before I posted it. Well the ink didn't dry that fast and I kept smudging. My fingers broke out in a rash...all for the sake of Xanga. So that is another reason why I don't get tattoos...ink and needles, a double whammy.
@godfatherofgreenbay -
can't give away your age, huh? haha, this is a question that i have actually pondered, to be honest.
but, if you were into these zubaz pants from the early 90s, chances are you were probably around your early 20s. so, now, if i had to guess, i'd say you were in your mid to late 30s.
am i close?
@entendezmavoix -
You are somewhat close, I have about 6 months of my 20s left and then I think I will revert to my teens. I claim that I don't mentally feel a day over 21.
@godfatherofgreenbay -
okay, that actually sits a lot better with me.
because i was pretty sure you were in your late 20s until the zubaz pants thing and that got me all sorts of confused and made me convince myself i was wrong. i feel better now, haha.
and, i don't know...21 is fun b/c you're young and everything...but i think i'll feel better when i'm closer to 29 than 21.
@entendezmavoix -
yes, Zubaz pants are confusing. They were huge in 92 or 93. Oh the coolest fads those years were Zubaz pants or silk shirts. Guess who wore both...at the same time?
21 is fun but the higher the number gets for me, the closer I get to my own demise. I felt indestructible when I was 21 but 4 days before my 22nd birthday I cheated death when I rolled my car off a 30ft cliff.
I have been trying to peg an age on you but sine I portray a gentleman from time to time, I will never ask.
@godfatherofgreenbay -
zubaz pants and silk shirts...oh you are quite the catch, aren't you?
jeez...well, i totalled my first car within 6 months of getting my license. granted, i didn't drive it off a cliff. but i'd say that cheating death sounds pretty indestructible. in fact if you're the kind of guy who can drive his car off a cliff and walk away, i think i wouldn't mind having someone like you around. though i would like to say that i have since become a much better driver than i once was and would like to believe, however naively, that you would be around for your company and not solely for your luck.
ooh, you don't know my age, huh? guess! i'm not old enough to deny my age
. i've narrowed it down for you...and i'm very much curious to know if narrowing it down changed your original number.
Wow, you sound like you'd be a great religion teacher! hehe, I had old fats guys tellin me that if a girl got excited from a guy holding their hand, that was sex!! omg, the hellish women we turned into!! lol Great post!
@entendezmavoix -
Oh yes, I am a fashion expert....actually not because I wear black shoes with blue pants.
I was coming home from student teaching and it had started sleeting. I was about a half mile from the place I was staying. A deer jumped out and I hit my brakes. I was on ice and spun and was facing the direction I came and then I rolled. I don't know how many times I rolled because the first time my car went upside down it compacted the roof and the force hit me in the head and knocked me out. I woke up about 30 minutes later and was hanging upside down. I had to crawl out the back window because the doors were jammed shut. Well crawling through broken glass and metal cut my wrists and I had to walk with my hands in the air otherwise I would spurt blood all over the place. I get to the house where I was staying and the pastor looks at me and asks what happened. I said I had an accident and I called 911. I only had a bad concussion and needed a couple stitches. Oh and my only non-deer accident was the time I rear ended an off duty state trooper from Iowa on vacation in my town. He pulled an idiot move and paid.
Wow the narrowing down you did made me more confused...20?
@Magenaslight -
Well see the difference was that I was a fat, young guy. I went to a religious high school and my sophomore year was the first year the school sponsored a dance and that was in the fall of 1995. They were worried about the whole thing where dancing might lead to students having sex.
@godfatherofgreenbay -
*gasp!* not black shoes with blue pants!!! haha, there are worse sins.
and oh my god! you realize how stupid it is that you nearly killed yourself to avoid hitting a deer, right?
how did i confuse you more by narrowing it down? how old did you think i was before? (i am 20, btw
) and, out of curiosity, when is your birthday?
@entendezmavoix -
Yes, I know. Everyone always says just hit the deer but it's just a gut reaction that you want to avoid contact.
Oh man, my birthday is actually in five months from yesterday.
@godfatherofgreenbay -
good sir, gut reaction or not it is my habit to impose great ridicule upon those who do silly things. you are no exception.
five months from yesterday, huh? so, february? or is my math all silly...but if it's not, *high five!* i'm a february baby too!
@entendezmavoix -
Awesome...all us February births have to stay together. I had never met anyone that had the same birthday as I did until I was sitting in my college piano class. The professor passed out brownies and said his birthday was on Saturday and he didn't know anyone else who had a birthday on that date. I raised my hand but he called on the girl that was the on again/off again center of my affection and she said her birthday was on Saturday. Whoa...creepy! I kept my hand up and he called on me disgustedly because he was trying to start class. I said my birthday was Saturday and he started laughing this maniacal laugh. It is hard for me to play piano without thinking of that guy.
@godfatherofgreenbay -
haha, that's awesome. and very bizarre. and i'd sort of freak out if an adult in a position of power over me whipped out a maniacal laugh, no matter the circumstances. have you mentioned this guy before? something about the whole scenario seems vaguely familiar.
and, the only kid i've ever met who had the same birthday as me was this pompous ass who i knew K-12. he's off in NY or something now. good riddance.
@entendezmavoix -
I think I haven't mentioned him much unless you read older posts. I will have to sometime write a post about him and all his jackassery.
YOU"VE HAD A PRINCE ALBERT?????
Um...wow....I'm trying to get my head around that. What in the devil possessed you? Did you scream like a little girl?
Man, every time I think of a guy getting a Prince Albert I think that he's got to be near impossible to get off considering feeling in the Peen and all. I mean if a man can take a stab to the bits then he must have a high sensitivity tolerance.
So, from a totally anthropologic standpoint...are you impossible to get off?
@ExposedWrists -
Well I wouldn't want someone to get their head around it but...sorry bad joke.
I was drunk at the time. I had just gotten back from Tijuana and my cousin was working at a tattoo parlor. I was begging for a tattoo and I think I wanted Mighty Mouse but they refused because I was drunk. Well I was also into piercing at the time so I said hey why not a few piercings. They said ok and gave me the belly button which I think was a joke on their part and the Prince Albert. It was an interesting experience because being drunk I thought that the girl who was doing the job was in love with me and well she was very gentle.
As for the getting off...well I have issues. I have always thought it was performance anxiety but I never got complaints mostly because when I was "active" the girls would complain about guys who only lasted a few minutes if not seconds. Anyway now I think I have it cured but who knows since I am celibate but not by choice.