September 5, 2010
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The Secret to Attaining Hot Women
Feign interest.
I forgot to do a post yesterday. I should have because it was Cat-urday. God, I am a loser.
When you figure it out, you will LOL and then charge me with crimes against humanity.
Oh that is one cool cat. Too bad that kegstand will get him fired from his job as…being a cat?
The ultimate photobomb.
Seriously…do it! I was shocked at how this worked. You also must post it in a vlog.
Once again…I am a loser.
Text messages are a tool of the devil.
Demi Moore’s bush is guilty of grand theft auto and Troy Polamalu is under investigation too.
Condoms are like tuxedos for your dick. You only wear them on special occasions.
I bet that is located on the Outer Spanks
I hear Hogwarts is quite pricey these days. If you can’t afford it, you can always try Analwarts Academy.
In this economy, no one should be throwing away sugar daddies.
Now Twilight fans can rest in peace…he’s been dead all along.
Oh…my…GAWD!
So…plan emergencies accordingly.
In case you can’t make out his sweater, it says “Fantastic Little Murderer”.
Oh…those…they’re our new item that we call Wacky Bread. They are more extreme than a regular pretzel.
Gentlemen…we ride at dawn.
Get it?
Did you?
And did you remember to send Mr. Lashua a birthday card? If you didn’t Mr. Lashua has a message for you:
Comments (52)
this was scary
It’s good to know Edward is dead. Thanks for clearing that up.
How about Cat-purr-day? Fun post!
@ShimmerBodyCream -
Oh…sorry you were scared
@my_little_niche -
You’re welcome. I saw a poetry page devoted to Twilight and I think people actually think that it’s a trues story or the people aren’t actors.
@POETIC_ISIS -
YES! Next Saturday is hereby Cat-purr-day…hopefully it will take our minds off the tragedies.
I loved all the cat ones.
I actually tried the salt thing out then I realized what I was going
The little girl on the horse made me laugh but I’m not really sure why….
omg cat eating corn is the best! love it!
and the little girl on the giraffe was hysterical
@NightlyDreams -
Did you see what the cats on the floor look like? Just curious if anyone got that.
Hahaha…the salt shaker…that is two successful. I need to find more like that. Now where is the video?
I always laugh at that little girl too. I think it’s because of her face and how serious she looks.
@BranmacFeabhail -
I wish my cats ate corn on the cob. One of them eats graham crackers. I left half a pack out one night thinking they’d be safe but I was woken up by crinkling plastic. There was one of them chewing on a cracker and her collar kept hitting the plastic. Then another time I forgot to put some away and she had them carried into a different room and ate half a pack.
My other cat likes tomatoes and tomato sauce. One day I ate some ravioli from a can and I left the empty can on the counter and planned on cleaning it after I ate. Well all of a sudden during my meal I hear a thud. She pushed it off the counter. I knew she had been licking the inside because it was bare and she had an orange ring around her head.
LOL @ the humerus. ;D
@godfatherofgreenbay - yeah i got it (didn’t take me too long either) a swastika.
Still cute lol
no vids for me
Our kitty used to eat corn on the cob like that. Absolutely ferociously LOVED it!
Ha! Swasti-Cats!
all cats should die. theyre evilllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll.
No… the kittens… ;-;
I’m still laughing over the little murderer.
A few good men…ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh a few goodman!!
;p gahahahahahahaha
@NightlyDreams -
oh darn…I’d love to see someone’s reaction when they learned what they were doing.
@Ampbreia -
that is awesome. My cats like graham crackers and tomatoes but the funny thing is that they won’t touch any milk.
@anonymiaous -
Some times I think my cats are especially when they jump on my chest and wake me up and just stare in my eyes like they are trying to steal my soul. And then one of them likes to flop herself down on my pillows as I sleep and her fur covers my face so I start choking because I can’t breath.
@emily_shannon -
haha
@TheDarkCreature -
It’s always the cute, quiet ones
@TheSecretLifeOfPandas -
LOL…I love that one.
@xchinkylaydee -
I am thinking of using that one for a profile pic and use it instead of typing lol all the time.
Edward isn’t dead. I’m calling Photoshop on that one. hehe
@supcheyenne -
Oh OK…I’ll let you have that one.
ok, i was seriously starting to worry that your brain did indeed explode the other day =P …until i got to the John Goodman pic …very humerus! =D
I wonder what the desert menu at Fuckahoe looks like. And that kid sure looks creepy! Even pedobear would be scared of that look!
The cat swastika is funny.LOL… Hey I live near Tuckahoe,NY…everyone knows that joke around here! LMAO!!!!
A few Goodmen – Ha!
I like the girl on the giraffe horse… which would be cool if we could cross breed those animals and then add bionic parts. That would be one hell of a show down!
oh that kitty is SO cute! and yeah, i friggin tried the salt thing. i’m so gullible. lol
@Peridot21 -
Oh man, maybe my brain did explode and I lost my sense of humor. I know my cousin who just died had brain cancer. Maybe I need to get checked out.
@ccRowp -
HAHAHAHA…pedobear would be afraid to look…that’s great.
@rickystarrr -
That’s cool that you live near there. I guess I wouldn’t be too funny if I showed up and started making jokes about it like I did when I moved into a town in Minnesota and they had a restaurant named Mei Dong.
@jacksoncroons -
I love that one
@theladyofabundance -
THAT WOULD BE AWESOME! You need to get right on writing that graphic novel.
@SoftlyPearlsSlipOffAString -
LOL…I didn’t do it but I tried to vision it in my head. I need to get people doing that caught on camera.
@godfatherofgreenbay - oh no, i’m so sorry, i had no idea (…and …from now on i’m going to leave being funny to the experts… and by experts, i mean you)
BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Humerus. :p.
@Peridot21 -
No, Ms. S, it’s ok. I started by using the brain exploding idea. Say what you want. What is that old saying…you can call me anything but don’t call me late for supper? You’re awesome so it’s allowed.
By the way…I think I am blushing.
@quodmenutriut -
I think I need to find a smaller version of that one so I can post it in posts that I find funny.
@godfatherofgreenbay -
ALSO. You’re going to hell for the cat swastika.
Pussy Swastika gives whole new meaning to the term Feminazi.
@godfatherofgreenbay - One of these days! One of these days! I swear my secret fantasy wish would be that I was the hot, new, cutting edge, AMAZING, highly succesful writer and artist to various comics, graphic novels, and movies.
I’d sit down with well known writers and other inspirational artists and we’d make the kind of stuff people weap over because its so damn good. They’d call us a revival or a rennisance.
Alas, there goes my fantasies of grandeur.
@quodmenutriut -
LOL…I hadn’t thought of the feminazi thing.
@theladyofabundance -
I remember I tried to draw comics when I was in high school despite not being able to draw. The stories revolved around a psychedelic mushroom named Buzz. He looked like an upside down penis and he was always trying to score be it drugs or a sexual partner. The publishers aren’t exactly beating down my door to buy the rights.
Fantasies of grandeur or fun. I like to think that I am an ideal mate.
@godfatherofgreenbay - awwww you’re blushing… how cute is that?! =) …wait, why are you blushing?? (see, evil… told ya) =P …but, srsly now, thank you …for, ya know, your awesome-ness! =)))
@Peridot21 -
Because you called me an expert at being funny. that is such an awesome compliment. I didn’t receive many of those growing up so I either brush them off because I don’t know how to handle them but THANK YOU SO MUCH! You deserve a postcard.
@godfatherofgreenbay - well you’re welcome so much! …aaaand i won’t be a brat about it anymore either …cause i’m not all that good at taking compliments myself, although i’m trying to be better about it… but it’s not easy, is it? =/
@Peridot21 -
I guess I should say that I didn’t ever get a compliment. I did but it was always followed by a request to do something. Now when I hear a compliment I always think there’s an ulterior motive behind it.
This is awesome. We can keep complimenting each other and thereby improve our accepting compliments.
@godfatherofgreenbay - ahaha omg that’s what i was thinking too… it’s been a veritable gush-fest for the last two… or ten!… comments. =D …hey, it’s better than being evil, right? =P
@Peridot21 -
Yes, but the strange thing is…get ready for compliment…you are very kind when you are evil. It’s the strangest thing. Hmmm maybe that means you are a fallen angel but then I guess the Bible says that the devil was a fallen angel….I’m starting to pull out my hair.