January 2, 2014

  • It looks like Xanga Team hasn't done anything here.  Sigh.
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    Happy New Year and junk

December 6, 2013

  • The Sound of Music Remake

    I didn't watch it because I liked the original but here are some things I'd like to see in the remake if I viewed it.

    • Halfway through, it just becomes Mary Poppins starring Jewel, and nobody notices.
    • Carrie Underwood takes a Louisville Slugger to both headlights of Hitler’s pickup truck.
    • The hills are alive, but you know, like, they have eyes.
    • A panicked look on Underwood’s face as she forgets “My Favorite Things” and has to make up the lyrics: “Raindrops on racists and nipples on chickens.”
    • Accidental swears.
    • I hope they keep the scene where the kids are lined up by height. Oh wait, that’s every scene.
    • Funkier new disco arrangements by Nile Rodgers and Hammerstein.
    • All the kids’ voices deepen four octaves between rehearsal and performance.
    • All the success of NBC’s last musical theatre endeavour, Smash.
    • A convoluted backstory to explain Underwood’s southern accent.
    • Sets that look an awful lot like the Cliffhangers set from The Price is Right.
    • Changing a few lyrics for sponsors: “How do you solve a problem like eczema? Cortizone!”
    • An acknowledgment of what the lonely goatherd does when he gets really lonely.
    • By popular demand, the Ricola jingle.
    • “La” breaks up with “Do Re Mi,” stating, “Is that all I am to you, a note to follow so?”

November 26, 2013

  • Strange Facts

    OK, gang, here are the true facts from last week's Strange Facts: 1, 3, 5, 7, 9, 11, 13, 15, 17, 19.

    This week there are 10 true facts and 10 false facts.  Can you determine which are which?

    1.  The “D.C.” in “Washington D.C.” originally stood for “Da Capital” but Abraham Lincoln thought it was unprofessional so he changed it.

    2.  Certain frogs can be frozen solid, then thawed, and survive.

    3.  The Hamburglar once had a sidekick named Hamburglar Helper.

    4.  If you try to suppress a sneeze, you can rupture a blood vessel in your head or neck and die.

    5.  In Idaho, it's perfectly legal to kill a man who doesn't compliment your four-wheeler.

    6.  7-Eleven is the largest retail chain in the world.

    7.  Sriracha also works as an aftershave.

    8.  18% of an Americans income is spent on transportation.

    9.  Some "whale song" is actually whale farts.

    10.  The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time television were Fred and Wilma Flintstone.

    11.  Despite occasionally being hit by them, deer actually loves jeeps.  The proof is if you flip the word “deer” upside down

    12.  3.6 cans of Spam are consumed each second.

    13.  Bears cannot smell grass.

    14.  60% of all people using the Internet, use it for pornography.

    15.  There are only 1200 false facts in existence.

    16.  Cats’ urine glows under a black light.

    17.  Serena Williams has 2 extra floating ribs.

    18.  Leo Fender, the founder of Fender guitars, never knew how to play the guitar.

    19.  Scientists have linked the size of one's pelvic bowl to the length and intensity of one's orgasm.

    20.  Deipnophobia is the fear of dinner party conversations.

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November 21, 2013

  • Something to Try

    TRY THIS.

    Go to Google Translate; Copy this text:

    pv zk bschk pv zk pv bschk zk pv zk bschk pv zk pv bschk zk bschk pv bschk bschk pv kkkkkkkkkk bschk bschk bschk pv zk bschk pv zk pv bschk zk pv zk bschk pv zk pv bschk zk bschk pv bschk bschk pv kkkkkkkkkk bschk bschk bschk pv zk bschk pv zk pv bschk zk pv zk bschk pv zk pv bschk zk bschk pv bschk bschk pv kkkkkkkkkk bschk bschk bschk pv zk bschk pv zk pv bschk zk pv zk bschk pv zk pv bschk zk bschk pv bschk bschk pv kkkkkkkkkk bschk bschk bschk pv zk bschk pv zk pv bschk zk pv zk bschk pv zk pv bschk zk bschk pv bschk bschk pv kkkkkkkkkk bschk bschk bschk

    Pick German as the ‘from’ language; Press the ‘Listen’-button
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November 20, 2013

November 18, 2013

  • Strange Facts

    OK, gang, here's the answers for last week's true facts: 2, 4, 6, 8, 10, 12, 14, 16, 18, 20.

    This week there are 10 true facts and 10 false facts.  Can you determine which are which?

    1.  While That 70s Show ran for 8 years, it only covered 3 years of time.

    2.  The iPhone 5 was so popular that Apple plans on releasing iPhone 6 in February.

    3.  Tea is the second most consumed beverage in the world, after water, with more consumed than coffee, soft drinks and alcohol combined.

    4.  Grand Theft Auto V is based on the life of Ghandi

    5.  The glass house in Ferris Bueller’s Day Off is on the market for $1.5 million.

    6.  Hitler was a keen AC/DC fan.

    7.  Jell-O flavors that didn't catch on: coffee, cola, and celery.

    8.  The first pyramid that was built was intended to be in the shape of a circle.

    9.  Skunks can accurately spray their smelly fluid as far as ten feet.

    10.  Facebook purchased the country of Germany on January 23, 2008.

    11.  When monkeys were introduced to the concept of money, they used it for prostitution.

    12.  Levitation is illegal in Arkansas.

    13.  Facebook is considered harder to resist than cigarettes and alcohol.

    14.  Air in Texas is contaminated with high amounts of iron.

    15.  11% of the world is left-handed.

    16.  As of November 22, 2013, Pink Floyd has re-released the album “The Wall” 33 times.

    17.  Rats multiply so quickly that in 18 months, two rats could have over a million descendants.

    18.  Zippo lighters are considered weapons of mass destruction in 18 states.

    19.  28% of Africa is classified as wilderness. In North America, it’s 38%.

    20.  It’s illegal to give someone your business card in Japan.

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November 14, 2013

November 11, 2013

  • Strange Facts

    OK so I forgot to mention that last week's post only had 10 true facts.    They were 3, 4, 7, 8, 11, 12, 15, 16, 19, 20.

    This week there are 10 true facts and 10 false facts.  Can you determine which are which?

    -1 pound of lemons has more sugar than one pound of strawberries.

    -Beetles taste like apples, wasps like pine nuts, and worms taste like fried bacon.

    -During the final days of the Civil War when the Confederacy was losing, they would bring bands out onto the lines to help boost soldiers’ morale.  The Union soldiers referred to the music the bands played as “blue grass notes” because the grass was never disturbed and the Confederate soldiers always looked sad.  This is how the term “bluegrass” came into being.

    -Upon being dumped by his girlfriend, a man sold the engagement ring and bought himself a full suit of Halo Armor.

    -Kevin Bacon’s birth name was Kevin Pork

    -IKEA stores are designed like mazes in order to make it more difficult for customers to leave.

    -Non-alcoholic alcohol is available in South America.

    -Paul McCartney was deported from Germany for setting a condom on fire for "extra light.

    -The iPhone 5s self destructs when the home button is pressed down for 5 minutes.

    -50,000 people are injured by toilets each year.

    -Aftershave is just water. Your brain makes it smell the way it does.

    -Studies have found that people with weird personalities tend to make the best friends, and the best life partners.

    -Jumping is known to increase your life expectancy.

    -Famous drug lord Pablo Escobar had so much cash, that rats ate almost $1 billion of his money each year.

    -Since 1942, the Catholic Church has considered one on one talking between a man and woman to be a sin.

    -Two brothers inherited one of the Hawaiian islands, Niihau, and turned down offers to sell it including $1 billion from the U.S.A.

    -Adidas originally made their money from cocaine with the slogan ‘Just Do It’.

    -An unfinished skyscraper in Venezuela has been taken over by squatters and is now home to 2500 people.

    -Pepsi is responsible hair loss.

    -James Bond has killed 150 men and slept with 44 women since the first movie in 1962.

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November 10, 2013

  • I am so sick.  I have been under multiple blankets for 33 of the last 36 hours.  Glad I slept through most of the Packers game.  I started the game with 10 toenails and finished with 7 and I have no clue what happened.  I think I am going to go cover up in a couple minutes right after I figure out why this county cop is sitting outside my house and trying to access my wifi.