Jehovah’s Witnesses don’t celebrate Halloween because they don’t appreciate random people knocking on their doors.
Month: October 2013
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Strange Facts
Sorry I haven’t been around much. Life really gets in the way.
10 of these are true. Can you guess which ones are true?
-John Larroquette was paid with pot for his voiceover work on the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre.
-Before color TV was invented, a majority of the population used to dream in black and white.
-Larry Bird has never eaten chicken.
-The word spelled most incorrectly in regional middle-school spelling bees is “status”.
-If you search 241543903 on Google images, you will find pictures of people putting their heads in refrigerators.
-Pigs are the enemies in Angry Birds because swine flu was happening when the game was being developed.
-”Roll Damn Tide” originated when Bama alums got jobs doing dry cleaning and couldn’t enunciate “rolled and tied”.
-Bear Bryant wore a houndstooth hat because it represented Alabama dentistry.
-The ambulance carrying Princess Diana took 110 minutes to take her to the hospital 6 kilometers away.
-Always exhale when your left foot hits the ground to avoid cramps while running.
-Jolly Ranchers were originally made at the turn of the century by ranchers for their children out of sugar and bone marrow.
-80% of all snakes have hidden feet.
-A single sperm contains 37.5 MB of DNA information. One ejaculation represents a data transfer of 15,875 GB.
-During WW2, Hitler ordered sex dolls to be made for his soldiers to prevent the spread of disease.
-The rhino ant eats the penis of its defeated enemy.
-Cats, due to brain function, don’t have the ability to dance.
-Putting your earphones into your nostrils and opening your mouth will create instant speakers.
-The police were called a total of 91 times during the filming of the movie “Borat.”
-Donkeys often mate in the missionary position.
-A study from the Univ of North Dakota, where 3000 men were interviewed, found that there are exactly 51 ways to leave your lover.
Picture Time…you may have to click on the gifs to view them move.
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Motivation
Have you ever wanted to eat pizza and have sex at the same time? Glad I’m not alone.
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Strange Facts
Well it looks like Xanga cured itself of the hiccup that I was experiencing the other day. Maybe the Xanga Team was actually working on this site. I also thought it may have been because I logged into Xanga on my PS3 but that didn’t make sense since they are on the same ISP. Anyway, I hope it’s resolved and Xanga starts improving.
10 of these facts are actually true.
-There are currently five different Wizard of Oz TV shows in development.
-Smoking destroys a protein in your body called elastin and when lost this causes breasts to sag
-To combat global warming, the United States government is suggesting that when Daylight Savings time ends, Americans set the clocks and thermometers back.
-The lead role for the movie “Gandhi” originally was offered to Burt Reynolds.
-Pope Francis has a master’s degree in chemistry.
-Squirrels are a very nice animal. If they find an abandoned squirrel baby they will adopt it if they notice the parents have not come back for it.
-The Don Corleone role in the movie “The Godfather” originally was going to be played by Andy Griffith.
-If you notify the flight attendant that it’s your birthday, most airlines will let you exit the plane on the inflatable slide.
-In TV commercials, the ice cream you see is actually mashed potatoes and the milk is white glue.
-The laugh tracks you hear on TV were recorded in the 1950′s, so most of the people you hear chuckling are dead.
-Square bologna (to fit properly on square bread) has failed each time that Oscar Mayer has test-marketed it. Round bread (to fit properly with round bologna) has succeeded each time it has been test-marketed, but the difficulty and expense in baking a round loaf of bread makes it unprofitable for bakeries.
-More Americans choke to death on bathmats than die in auto accidents.
-Johnny Depp plans on having his cremated remains poured into a flask of whiskey, and requests everyone at his funeral to take a sip.
-26 feet was the longest recorded poop.
-When eaten, long vegetables (such as carrots, celery, etc.) that have been sliced lengthwise have double the vitamins absorbed by the body.
-Electronics merchant Radio Shack may have to change its name because of a pending lawsuit from Shaquille O’Neal.
-University of Oregon plagiarized the section on plagiarism in its student handbook from Stanford’s teaching handbook.
-”Weird Al” Yankovic finished elementary school two years early, was valedictorian of his high school, and earned a degree in architecture.
-Vice President Dick Cheney had electrolysis in 2005 to remove his eyebrows. The ones you see now are tattooed on.
-President George W. Bush has locked himself out of the Oval Office fifteen times in his presidency. President Obama has only locked himself out three times and once was during the government shutdown so nothing of value was lost.
-Philadelphia Eagles star Michael Vick got involved in dogfighting because cockfighting wasn’t what he thought it was.
-According to the United States Treasury, there are four 15-dollar bills in circulation.
-Rhode Island is the only state without an active volcano.
-Time Magazine’s 1951 Man of the Year was Moe of the Three Stooges.
-Larry King attributes his youthful looks to his diet of broccoli and Red Vines.
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Motivation
The only thing I discovered on Columbus Day was that the bank and post offices were closed.
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Midnight Confessions
-I currently have a boner
-I was a judge for a Xanga erotica contest. I bought a vibrator to give if the winner was female. I didn’t get to voice this to the person running the contest so I now have a vibrator sitting in my room.
-I want to host the first ever Xanga 2.0 contest and call it “Who Wants a Vibrator” but without recs it’s sort of stupid.
-I thought I was going to die last night. I lost a lot of blood last night and I will spare you the graphic details but I collapsed because I didn’t have any strength.
-I wish I had one of those old lady “help I’ve fallen and can’t get up” necklaces
-I have had numerous crushes on Xangans including the current but I am too chicken to make my feelings known because of a negative experience.
-My eyes teared up with joy when I saw my Xanga was on The Huffington Post and CNN.
-I’ve always felt myself to be a theologian and know more about the Bible than a lot of the people who consider themselves Christians and wrote for Revelife. I think that is the sin of pride.
-I have to admit that I enjoy watching Man vs. Food. I admit that I have sort of a schadenfreude fascination with it because this is a show where a man goes around the United States partaking of eating competitions where he doesn’t finish all the food and then this program is broadcast to regions where people are severely malnourished.
-I don’t consider myself to be tall.
-I had chicken pox three times
-I had so many of these little confessions to make but I lost them all because I’ve had at least 10 concussions in my life. The most recent was a couple weeks ago. I for some reason misjudged the height of my bathroom door(maybe because I was wearing work boots) and I hit my head on the top and the door frame and I basically knocked myself silly.
-I’ve been electrocuted 3 times. I had different side-effects each time. After the first time my hair stood on end for about 5 hours and made me drool quite a bit. The second time left me with an irregular heartbeat that basically went away after I did some running around. I also had a large red welt across my chest where I fell on the electric fence. The last time made my shirt melt, I lost hair on my hands, my toes had burns, and I ejaculated sparks.
-I’ve been called the n-word at least four times in my life.
-I chew my fingernails.
Picture Time
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Strange Facts
-I was the ghost writer for DMX’s “Party Up in Here”
-I wrote an entire season of “My Name is Earl” but because of the writer’s strike my episodes weren’t picked up and the show was canceled.
-70% of the internet is occupied by hypocrites
-When two extremely possessive people fall in love with each other , telecommunication companies make an abnormal amount of money.
-There’s a Coldplay song for every single emotion you can feel except a kick in the balls
-Kangaroos have 142 words for “boing”
-The second world war started when Winston Churchhill refused to follow Hitler on Xanga 2.0
-Former British Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher helped invent soft-serve ice cream.
-To the Vikings, it was considered rude to kill someone wearing green.
-Putting a stick of margarine in a diesel engine will increase mileage by approximately 10%.
-Osama Bin-Laden had a lifetime subscription to Mad magazine.
-In Norway, pickled herring is a separate food group.
-Albert Einstein was an avid bodybuilder.
-If the Earth was put on a scale, scientists would be puzzled by the presence of that scale.
-After extensive study of the Shroud of Turin, it has now been theorized that Jesus had muttonchops.
-The most downloaded song on iTunes in 2007 was “Afternoon Delight” by the Starland Vocal Band.
-After he was President, Harry S. Truman briefly coached the Boston Celtics.
-Queen Elizabeth has seen the movie “Spaceballs” at least twelve times. She used to screen the movie for foreign dignitaries.
-Isaac Newton invented the game Hopscotch.
-Although Thursday is historically thought of as being named after the god Thor, it was actually named for his brother Thur.
-Xanga 2.0 is dead.
Picture time
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Go to my previous post to see if you won the right to ask me a question.
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