May 20, 2010

• Lukewarm Links 5/20

  You know feeling like a piece of meat is awesome.  Yes, someone said they wanted to have sex with me over at some other blog.  I don't usually find myself on lists like that so I am gloating.  Thank you whoever said that because it made my day.   I have thought that I lost my sex appeal especially since the hookers won't charge me anything and make me promise not to tell anyone.

  Link time...
  1.  Have you ever wondered how celebrities spend their tax returns?  Well here is a site that has some possibilities. 

  2.  I often talk about hipsters.  Here is a guide to everything you wanted to know about hipsters.  Sadly the Minneapolis hipsters aren't covered.  They were the coolest.  They all wore flannel and had full beards, even the girls.  OK not the girls, they usually wore poodle skirts.  I figured all the hispters were taking benzendrine while drinking their Grain Belt...yes, Minneapolis hipsters don't drink the swill that is PBR, they drink quality beer...GRAIN BELT!

  3.  I like movies.  Do you like movies?  Do you like me asking so many questions?  Do you feel like this is one fucking huge test?  Do you want to have sex with me?  OK so have you watched a movie and thought, "God, how the hell did that guy get that part?"  Well here is a list of some baffling movie casting. 

  4.  Yahoo Answers is proof positive that every single school in America needs to teach comprehensive sex education.

  5.  Stalking people via twitter has become quite easy thanks to this little device that calculates when the person sleeps based on their activity.  I think my sleep time is a little off.

  6.  This is my internet homepage.  Make sure you have them speakers turned up.

  7.  I am odd in what attracts me to women.  I'll admit it, one thing I love is cleavage.  Another thing I love is money.  How to combine the two?  The Cleavage Caddy...ladies you can store so much in the cleavage caddy.  Of course you would have me staring more.  "Oh hey, it looks like you got a text message."

  8.  I am going to move to Las Vegas just for the opportunity to join this band.  Speaking of bands, I got a message earlier today about a Christian punk rock band called "Reverse Queers".  Anyone have any info on them?

  9.  Today I walked up to a couple guys who were cutting pieces of wood.  The first guy said to the second guy with the saw, "Make sure it's long enough." I said, "That's what she said."  I should have said, "That's what Bea said."

  10.  This website is why I am not allowed to teach science.

  11.  There are some devout Seinfeld fans out there and it's really sad when they use the term "giggle-pusses".

  12.  People tell me I talk in my sleep but most often it is unintelligible.  The last person that slept with me said that I went on a cuss spree and dropped about 15 f-bombs in a row.  This guy is recorded talking in his sleep.  Most of it is pretty funny and oddly some makes sense.

  I think I am going to have to do two of these posts a week because the links are piling up. 
  

  
  Statistically, one out of ten guys is a total dumb-ass, and you're looking at him.

  • 11:44 PM
  • 20 Comments